The Sp Ascension Sect was buzzing with excitement. Disciples trained their palms until they bled. Wooden dummies shaped like arrogant young masters littered the courtyard, their faces permanently stuck in expressions of disbelief.
The reason?
The Grand Sp Tournament.
Held once every decade in the Sacred Arena of Face Palm Mountain, the tournament attracted thousands of cultivators across realms. The prize?
Eternal bragging rights
A divine sp technique manual
A melon
Yes. A melon. No one knew why. The melon was rumored to grant enlightenment. Or it might just be a fruit.
Whatever.
Xiao Fan was invited as an honored spper.
But he wasn't interested… until he heard the announcer yell:
"AND THIS YEAR, THE RULER OF THE TOURNAMENT IS…
THE CURRENT RANK 1 IN THE WORLD—
THE ONE WHO NEVER GETS SLAPPED—
THE SLAPLESS KING HIMSELF—
DAOIST CHEEK DEFLECTOR!!!"
Everyone gasped.
Xiao Fan blinked.
"Daoist what now?"
---
Meanwhile, at the Tournament Registration Booth…
A trembling elder looked at Xiao Fan's name on the form.
"Sir, are you sure? Entering this tournament means risking permanent face disfigurement. Some never recover their pride."
Xiao Fan smiled.
"I was born without shame."
---
Tournament Arena: Round 1
Xiao Fan stepped onto the stage.
His first opponent?
A young master wearing five rings, six gold chains, and a forehead tattoo that said "Respect Me." He performed a dance routine before attacking.
"I am the descendant of the Heaven-Sying Palm Sect! Behold, my signature sp: Fming Phoenix Pity Palm!"
The move created a firebird-shaped sp.
It looked cool.
Until Xiao Fan stepped forward and said:
"Cute."
SLAP!
The firebird combusted mid-air.
The young master spun in pce like a fidget spinner before colpsing with swirls in his eyes.
Xiao Fan cracked his knuckles.
"Next."
---
Round 2: Dual Sp Match
Two twins known as the Harmony Hands stepped forward, cpping in sync.
"We sp together."
"We sp as one."
They charged at once.
But Xiao Fan used an ancient footwork style called: "Sidestep of Disrespect."
He dodged, yawned mid-air, and spped them both with one hand.
Double KO.
The crowd went insane.
---
Meanwhile, in the VIP Box…
Daoist Cheek Deflector narrowed his eyes.
This man… was dangerous.
His face, however, remained calm.
Because it was impossible to sp.
Why?
Because of his secret:
> Forbidden Sp Counter Technique: Heavenly Cheek Deflection!
Legend says it took 999 years of intense face cultivation. Daoist Cheek Deflector trained his cheeks to be so smooth, so spiritually aerodynamic, that sps would slide right off, redirecting the force into the spper's own face.
Only three people in history had mastered this style.
All of them were banned from pillow fights.
---
Final Round: Xiao Fan vs Daoist Cheek Deflector
The arena went silent.
Daoist Cheek Deflector descended like a prince of manners. His robes were spotless. His expression was bored. His aura radiated calm, cultivated smugness.
"Xiao Fan," he said. "Your sps are loud, but ultimately meaningless. You ck technique. Grace. Cheek respect."
Xiao Fan shrugged. "I don't need technique. I have hands."
He charged.
SLAP!
But the moment his hand touched Daoist Cheek Deflector's face…
WHOOSH—BOING!
The sp curved around the man's cheek and redirected back into Xiao Fan's own face.
SMACK!
Xiao Fan spun like a helicopter.
The audience screamed.
He nded, coughing blood and glitter.
Daoist Cheek Deflector smirked.
"Pathetic. My cheeks are the pinnacle of sp deflection. You cannot win."
Xiao Fan stood up, ughing.
"You're right… I can't sp you normally."
"But what if I sp…"
He vanished.
"…from the inside?"
Daoist Cheek Deflector froze. "What?!"
Xiao Fan appeared behind him—holding a spiritual sp pill.
He jammed it into his own mouth and activated his inner technique:
> Forbidden Sp Dao: Palm of Internal Reversal—Soul Cheek Breaker!
The pill exploded in Qi.
Xiao Fan's hand turned translucent. His soul hand reached into Daoist Cheek Deflector's face.
Time stopped.
The heavens trembled.
Daoist Cheek Deflector's eyes widened. "No… Nooo—!"
SLAP!
It nded inside his mind.
---
BOOOOM!!!
His spiritual cheek defenses shattered.
Daoist Cheek Deflector flew across the arena like a defted balloon, crashing into the VIP section and wiping out several elders drinking tea.
Silence.
Then...
"XIAO FAN WINS!"
The crowd roared.
Xiao Fan stood tall, face bruised, soul burning, but victorious.
---
Later, at the Prize Ceremony…
Xiao Fan received:
A sp technique manual titled "How to Palm Your Enemies and Make Them Cry."
A heavenly melon (that whispered wisdom).
And a pair of spiritual sungsses.
Fairy Lin Yue appeared beside him. "You did it. You beat the sp god."
Xiao Fan bit into the melon. "Yeah. I spped his soul. I feel like a therapist."
She snorted. "What will you do now?"
He put on the sungsses.
"Sp the heavens, probably."
