Patricia Greenwood

  —

  I woke up the next morning feeling too tired. Most of a bottle of good wine would do that, but luckily my head wasn't pounding like it would have if I had finished the whole thing. I stumbled my way downstairs in the dim pre-dawn light, idly turning the coffee maker on as I stepped outside.

  I loved it here in Pallet Town. It was such a small, sleepy place, and I was on the outskirts, but the joy of being able to relax in peace more than made up for it. I certainly wouldn't be moving back to Saffron City, that's for sure! Instead of waking up to the sounds of car horns, yelling, and the screeches of various Pokemon and humans on their way to deliveries and jobs, I got to enjoy the crisp morning air and Pidgey cries. I got to enjoy the way the tips of the trees seemed to burn as the sky lightened, and I especially enjoyed the first true rays of sunlight over the horizon to the east that cut through the purple sky like spears of light.

  This morning I also got to enjoy the sight of the huge Alpha Fearow that was still sleeping in my backyard.

  Its head shot up as I opened the door, and we both froze, eyes locked onto each other. Eventually I relaxed a bit, releasing the sliding door, and the huge avian settled back down into the grass, eyes still following me.

  Oh. Yeah.

  Erin.

  That girl!

  I stood there for a moment blinking rapidly, trying to get my thoughts in order before I even had caffeine. Erin and Riahan stumbled into a Team Rocket operation last night. They left Leaf behind to wait for the police and then confronted the terrorists. Erin had not only brutally knocked out the guard they had left at the gate, she had personally killed the leader of the local cell! Before she had her sweet little kelp dragon kill and maim the rest!

  They had done a good deed, for sure. Pewter Cities police department wanted to give them awards! They had captured almost two dozen members of Team Rocket! Only half had survived, but still! They had rescued dozens of Pokemon and humans from future misery. They had done the right thing!

  Yet, nobody was happy with them. Erin had risked her life. For good reason, yes. I wouldn't argue with the results, and I had never been in a true fight. Not a real fight with real consequences. I couldn't and wouldn't judge her for her actions. For her orders, her kills.

  She had still taken a risk.

  Raihan? Raihan was an adult, and while me and him would have to have some words about Erin, I wasn't mad at him, not really. Not badly… He was a Gym Leader. Foreign or not, he had done his job last night, and I would never begrudge him that.

  Even if they had both left my daughter alone to watch her two mentors rush into danger. Towards their possible deaths.

  I shook my head a little, trying to clear my thoughts. I caught the eye of the Fearow and smiled a bit. It was like Erin to show up on a wild Alpha of a hyper-aggressive species. I couldn't help but be curious, myself. Most people never got a good look at a Spearow, they were so aggressive, much less a Fearow.

  Fearow ate people.

  "I don't suppose you drink coffee, hmm?" It cocked its huge head at me and I chuckled.

  Leto ate people, and I had relaxed around her, too.

  When I came back outside next I had a cup of steaming coffee and two raspberry muffins. I lifted one of them and watched the Fearow's head follow it. I tossed the avian the baked treat, and judging by the way its crest rose, it enjoyed my cooking. I couldn't stop the giggle that erupted from me. It was huge, and could kill me in moments, but it looked so adorable right now, crest all extended, eyes wide.

  "Sorry, sorry, you just looked like you really enjoyed that." The bird stopped glaring at my amusement, turning its eyes towards my muffin. I grinned at the Pokemon.

  "You want another one? You're a little too big for me to actually feed, but I can certainly spare another muffin for you." The huge head bobbed up and down eagerly and I laughed.

  When Erin finally came downstairs she found me idly chatting with the Fearow, a bucket of water next to the bird's feet along with a half-drank cup of coffee on the table in front of it. They weren't a huge fan. From what it had managed to pantomime, the huge bird had practically been ambushed by Erin, scared half to death, then begged for a ride. The Alpha was female, single, and had just set her latest troublesome brood loose into the world, though she already worried for them.

  Turns out I had a lot in common with a giant man-eating bird. Who knew?

  "Morning Patricia…" Erin mumbled as she stepped outside, her own cup of coffee held in her hands. She looked terrible, honestly, hair and face a mess, Leaf's pajamas full of wrinkles, but it was still better to see than that mask she had finally dropped last night. I gave her a warm smile as she sat down, Fearow's eyes following her every move. Warily, but worriedly, too.

  "Good morning, dear. I saved you a muffin, but if you want something more you'll have to cook it yourself." I was off today, I had baked those muffins for a reason: relaxing mornings. She shook her head, eyes closed as she sipped at the steaming liquid.

  "Sometimes I don't eat breakfast. Coffee is good enough…" I chuckled at her words.

  "You know, caffeine is bad for growing children." Her eyes cracked open to glare at me. "I'm not saying stop drinking it, Erin. Was that a frequent thing… before? Not eating breakfast?" What a stupid way to segue into the topic, but screw it. How do you even ask?

  "I mean… it depended?" She was frowning now. "There were very few times I just didn't have food, but…" She got very quiet for a moment as she thought.

  "When I was still… actively an alcoholic, yeah. It's hard to eat when you're vomiting." Her voice was quiet as my eyes widened. "Then, once I finally kicked that habit? Sometimes I would wake up and want nothing more than a nice, home cooked breakfast, and I would cook up a storm. Sometimes I just wasn't hungry. Sometimes I would wake up and refuse to move, so those days I just… didn't eat." She cleared her throat and looked up at me, eyes cloudy.

  "You can just ask your questions, Patricia, no need to try and be sneaky. There's certain things you'll never hear from me, but I'll tell you what I can." I frowned at her words. The Fearow just stared at Erin as she began to eat the muffin. Stared at the muffin. With a small smile she tossed half of it to the huge avian, who snapped it out of the air with a trill of delight.

  "I mean… It was a different world, dear?" She nodded, eyes closed again.

  "Different world, possibly different universe? I didn't exactly have a conversation with Arceus about it when I came here. Or maybe Jirachi. Arceus could have done it, of course, but… Jirachi might have been granting a wish? Probably?" Jirachi? I remained quiet as she seemed to argue with herself. Finally she seemed to shrug and deflate, eyes still closed.

  "In my old world I was a very unhappy, lonely, thirty year old trans woman. I know the term exists here, too." It did, and I was grateful she was trusting me enough with the information. Not that her having been transgender was comparable to her being from an entirely different world, of course, but still. Her voice was rough as she continued.

  "I was… miserable. Depressed. Someone who's never been truly depressed can't imagine the feeling. It's not being sad. It's not never knowing joy. Some of my best memories happened while I was depressed. Just because I could be filled with joy and wonder occasionally didn't mean I was okay. Every moment of everyday life was a struggle. A struggle to care about myself. To… feel anything positive about myself." She wasn't crying, but her voice was growing rougher.

  "To be honest? I never really did. Ever. I substituted instead. I cared about others as best I could. I cared about my aunt, the only one in my family who never turned her back on me for being trans. I cared about my animals. I cared about my cat, and when she died and left me alone in my house… I didn't care. I missed her, of course, I was devastated, but without forcing myself to be responsible for another's life, I just… didn't care. At all." Her eyes were still closed, but she sounded so… defeated.

  "I'm glad I died, Patricia. That world had nothing in it for me. My family was dead to me, and the only ones I cared about died peacefully. I had a few casual friends online I feel bad about, but that's it. This world is my home now." Her eyes finally opened, and those spooky purple eyes of hers were calm.

  "My old world can keep my old self, just like it kept my cold, dead corpse. This world isn't perfect. Not like I had hoped it would be, but it's still so much better than my old one, Pokemon aside." Fearow gave a little cry at that, and Erin jerked, as though she had forgotten the huge avian was right next to her. She probably had, actually!

  "Universal healthcare? Education? Crime rates? Unemployment? Universal basic income? Housing? Some aspects of this world, or at least Galar and Indigo, are so far beyond my own it's embarrassing. Some aspects it trails so far behind, though. 'Let's let ten year olds go capture monsters!' would get you put in jail in my old world. Thirteen, too. If it were my old world, you would have to be eighteen at the minimum. Or just military only…" She frowned in thought.

  "We had terrorist organizations, but other than Team Rocket, none are really comparable to this world. In mine, terrorists might detonate a bomb. Kill thousands. In the worst case scenario, they might even be able to kill millions, tens of millions in seconds, especially if they went after some of the larger dams…." I felt the blood draining out of my face as she continued.

  "In this world, however? Teams Magma and Aqua would have killed millions easily as they unleashed Groudon and Kyogre before Rayquaza could stop them, and let's not even get started on using the Pokemon gods of time and space themselves!"

  Excuse me, what was that last part!?

  And the first!?

  "Technology is weird here, too. You have spheres that absorb mass! I mean, that breaks so many laws of physics by itself, and that's without some of the more insane things I've heard of here! Then I look at the PokeNet and it's like looking decades into the past. The culture, too!"

  "Indigo is based on-" She abruptly stopped herself. "-is similar to Japan from my world. Technically, I would have been from Unova? The regions are close enough…" Excuse me, Erin! I am not that easily distracted!

  I am not my daughter!

  "Indigo is based on…?" She frowned at me for a long moment as she looked into my eyes.

  "What came first, Patricia? The Pidgey or the Egg?" I was confused for a moment before she continued.

  "Did the Egg come first, because Pidgeys hatch from Eggs? But the Egg had to come from somewhere, right? Which came first? I'm sure scientists in my old world had actually figured out the answer, digging through the fossil record to find the first egg just for a laugh, but it doesn't matter. The point is, both rely on the other. One cannot exist without the other."

  That wasn't helping my anxiety at all, Erin… That wasn't an answer.

  "I don't know which world came first, or if either one did, or if it's even just two! I don't know anything, I'm just making some educated guesses. They're similar, but our worlds are so different. The time is off, too. It was 2025 when I died, but it's 2001 here." She sighed, brightening a little.

  "Either way, it's so different here. It's so real, so fantastical, and despite Team Rocket, despite their horrors, it's so peaceful, too! This world is a utopia in comparison with my old one!" I laughed at her naivety, and her eyes grew hard.

  "Patricia, how many wars are currently going on in the world?" Her tone was so serious I stopped laughing, looking at her in confusion.

  "None, Erin? The last war was the Great War in the late Sixties. There's always a border fight somewhere, though. The world is far from peaceful." Peaceful? If only. She shook her head, eyes hard as they stared me down.

  "Patricia, your Great War cost the world how many lives?" I gulped at the question.

  "Most estimates place it at around five million, such a huge percentage… why?" I really didn't like the look in her eyes.

  "This world has had one 'Great War', Patricia. Mine had two." I felt my breath catch as she continued.

  "The First World War was the most wide-spread conflict in human history, but it wasn't the most devastating up till that point. During the time of the Three Kingdoms in China, a single region from my world almost two thousand years before, estimates place the death toll around thirty four million. With swords and spears and bows and arrows." My face began to tingle as she continued. That was almost the world population!

  "The First World War cost the world an estimated fifteen to twenty-two million deaths. We never had an accurate count, considering how many artillery shells were flying around burying people alive. Corpses rotted in the trenches right next to their comrades. It was the deadliest, most wide-spread conflict up to that point in history, even if there were less deaths, and it was such a radically different war than anything before it that it was a slaughter for everyone. It was an absolute nightmare. It traumatized entire generations." She took a deep breath, face grim as I tried to breathe.

  "The Second World War was the deadliest conflict in my world's history by a long shot. Automatic weapons, tanks, planes, battleships the size of a small town. There was a singular battle that took place that was so infamous you were guaranteed to hear the name 'Stalingrad' at least once before you ever got to that lesson in history class. Over four million deaths over a single city will leave its mark." She sighed heavily.

  "The war was eventually ended with two bombs so powerful that they annihilated cities. Think about the kind of power one of the Legendary Birds could bring about. They were…. worse, in some ways." She groaned.

  "Patricia... What is the current estimated world population?" I stared at her in silence for a moment, reluctant to answer. Eventually, however, I did.

  "Last estimates put us at around fifty million humans…" She nodded at me slowly, her eyes bleak.

  "World War Two cost my world anywhere from seventy to eighty-five million deaths, Patricia. My world had a population of almost eight and a half billion humans when I died. We didn't have Pokemon, though. It's a lot easier to spread and multiply when you're not dodging fireballs and literal Thunder Birds…" I tried to wrap my head around numbers like that and I just couldn't. It was hard to wrap my head around a million lives, a thousand souls…

  "It was estimated that humanity in my world had never gone more than a year without some sort of conflict larger than skirmishes occurring. Maybe not even a day. My world was always at war, even if I had been insulated from the worst of it. Just because I had never been to war didn't mean it wasn't seen. Broadcast. Live-streamed for people's entertainment. War was always happening somewhere, and if I had wanted to do nothing more than to drown in human suffering? I could have done that a million times over, Patricia, and still I wouldn't come close to even acknowledging the scope of the horror." I… didn't have words. None that were adequate.

  "Your world is so peaceful, and you don't even know it. Most people have never even heard of famine, because how do you starve when there's edible Pokemon everywhere? Grass types that can accelerate growth rates? Rain Dance to water your crops, Sunny Day and Earth types to stop them from flooding! We did that by hand, by tool, or we just starved. More people starved to death in my world than died in military conflicts throughout history, easily." She was right. Famine was something that only happened to the worst, most arid regions where people usually didn't live.

  "Do you know the most common cause of death here? I've looked it up. The statistics are always changing, but it's overwhelmingly wild Pokemon attacks, by a huge margin. In my world? It really depended on the area, but it might be a disease of some sort, pathogen, biological, genetic. Strokes and heart attacks. A stray bullet. A knife in an alley. Healthcare 'companies' that would kill you, because it was cheaper than actually treating you. A car crash. Slipping on a wet floor that an underpaid, underappreciated employee forgot to mark as wet, cracking your skull open." She sighed, shaking her head slightly.

  "At any time of day, Patricia, I knew for a fact that someone was being shot. Blown up. Tortured… I know this isn't a utopia, and that evil people exist. Beyond Team Rocket and the other teams, I know evil people exist everywhere there are humans. It just seems so much… cleaner, here, still." Her face grew tight.

  "In my old world… human life is cheaper than it is here. It's far more common." She sighed again.

  "Erin…" She cut me off.

  "Sorry, I didn't mean to get so… dark. What I mean is, this world is amazing, and despite everything it's so peaceful, and I don't want to go back, ever… But every time I think about Team Rocket, especially after seeing those poor Pokemon last night, it's just so…" Her breath caught in her throat and I winced. I hated having to deliver this.

  "About that, Erin…" Her eyes met mine. "Apparently they're holding the rescued Pokemon for you. They told me when they called to inform me last night. They want you to come in today to… decide." Her face fell, and I reached over to grasp her shoulder.

  "I never actually… confirmed. But… they'll be killed, won't they?" Her voice was so small, and I felt myself tear up a bit as well. Fearow was giving her an alarmed look, as well.

  "That is generally the… only option. The Pokemon of terrorist organizations are… hit or miss. Some adapted. They got used to the cruelty. Most don't, but they obey orders all the same..."

  She got so quiet for a minute, eyes closed as she slowly drank her coffee. Her eyes finally popped open and she stood rapidly.

  "I need to make a few calls, Patricia, I'll be right back. You stay here!" She pointed at an amused Fearow as she walked through my gate, and then she was gone.

  I exchanged amused looks with Fearow. Erin could be described in many ways, but indecisive generally wasn't one of them.

  —

  Leaf

  —

  "No, mom! I don't need you to come here! I'm fine! We went over this last night!"

  "Dear, I know you said you're fine, but really-" I cut her off before she could just keep going.

  "Mom! I'm fine! I never even saw anything! The police just got a location from me and sent me back to the Center to wait!" Her mouth tightened and I continued hesitantly.

  "Is… Erin coming back soon?" Not that we had any idea how the girl had somehow managed to get to my house in an hour and a half! My moms mouth tightened a bit more.

  "Erin is coming back soon, to… to deal with the Rocket Pokemon she liberated last night." I felt my mouth go dry.

  "Is she… okay?" My moms eyes weren't warm as she stared back at me. They weren't mean, but they weren't kind, either.

  "She's been better, Leaf. She did a hard thing last night. A good thing. A necessary thing. Then she was ambushed by her family and friend." I flinched as she spoke, but I was already shaking my head.

  "Mom, she abandoned me last night! She went off with two Pokemon and could have easily got herself killed!" Her eyes still weren't warm, but they were understanding.

  "That's true, Leaf. I agree with you, actually. It doesn't stop the fact that she needed her friend, her family-" I saw her eyes move to my background, Leto's stomach. "-to be there for her in a vulnerable moment, and instead of doing that, comforting the girl who had just killed and maimed people in defense of others… Instead, they glare at her. They pushed her away, Leto!" The return growl from behind me was so small I barely felt it.

  "So no, Leaf. Erin isn't okay. She's hurting, and she's mad, but right now she doesn't give a damn about you, me, or anyone but those poor, abused Pokemon she suddenly has total authority over. She's trying her best to convince the Professor to let her keep them at his Ranch, and before that I heard her screaming at Looker for something." My eyes opened in shock as my mom cursed. I don't think I had ever heard that! Then her words sank in.

  Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.

  I had talked with Raihan last night. Argued, mainly, but I was less upset with him than Erin. Raihan was an adult, and even if he didn't have any Pokemon last night, he was a Gym Leader. We had talked for an hour, after we calmed Leto down and realized that Erin somehow hitched a flight to Pallet Town.

  Raihan had gotten a lot more information from the police as a Gym Leader, foreign or not, than I had as a witness. Erin was now the temporary owner of one Houndour, one Poochyena, five Ekans, nine Rattata, and one very dangerous Koffing. Seventeen Pokemon that, with no input from Erin, would be… disposed of. It was a dark stain that the authorities didn't like to talk about.

  What do you do when you capture ten Rockets, and each has two or three Pokemon? Stasis in balls only went so far, and they would still need to be fed eventually. Attempts were always 'made', according to Raihan, but they were never serious attempts. Abuse a Pokemon long enough, it would always be on edge. The best intentions in the world couldn't stop tragedy.

  Victoria the Houndour was the infamous case. Her background was never specified other than a Team Rocket rescue, but she was the shining star of the rehabilitation programs. She had led dozens of other Pokemon through therapy. Recovered from her own scars, her own mental agony. She was the star of multiple charities for rescued Pokemon. She had a loving family with multiple small children that adored her, that she adored.

  Then a transformer down the road blew one night. They found her family's torn corpses in the charred remains of their house. Victoria had let herself die of smoke inhalation, surrounded by the bodies of her family that she had killed by accident.

  The unfortunate reality was that, these days, Rocket Pokemon weren't rehabbed. They were just put down. It wasn't quite a law, but after Victoria, nobody wanted to be the next victim of such a tragedy, so it may as well have been. Most of the rescue organizations had quietly stopped accepting new Pokemon, or just shut down.

  "H-How would that even work?" Her eyes were worried as she shook her head.

  "I… don't know, Leaf. She's not going to let them just be put down, though. You know that." I did, and that's what worried me. That's what terrified me.

  "Is Professor Oak going to… help?"

  "I'm… I'm not sure, Leaf. The Professor is one of the best people I know, but he has a responsibility to every Pokemon at his Ranch to ensure their safety. Can he say for certain that they will be, with over a dozen potentially volatile Pokemon added in?" My stomach twisted as she spoke.

  That made an unfortunate amount of sense. Professor Oak was rich, rich beyond rich, but the vast majority of his fortune was either donated, or it went right back into his Ranch. The same Ranch that served as a stable for dozens of his sponsored trainers, a minor preserve for a few endangered species, and he even took care of any Pallet Town resident's Pokemon, if they had to leave for some reason!

  He made sure that every child in Pallet Town received at least a Rank 2 Pokemon as their starter, often much higher if you were qualified.

  Professor Oak was generous, kind, and charitable.

  He also wasn't a fool.

  "He won't. He can't." She nodded sadly at me through the screen.

  "No, he's not going to be able to help. It's too much liability, too many chances for something to go wrong there. Erin can send him normal Pokemon she captures, easily, but Rocket rescues? No, she's going to have to figure something else out." Her eyes were wet, and mine were as well. That wasn't fair! They didn't choose that!

  I almost missed the blur behind my mom through my tears, but I didn't. I stiffened, eyes widening in alarm.

  "Mom, behind you!" She looked behind her before smiling. Suddenly a huge beak entered the screen, eventually followed by the actual face. Oh my Arceus, it was massive! What was an Alpha Fearow doing with its face pressed up against my moms!

  "Oh, you mean Maddy?" She gave me an open, easy smile, eyebrows raised. She was amused. She was acting like this situation was perfectly normal!

  "Who the hell is Maddy?!" The huge head snickered at me. My mom just smiled and bumped the giant beak with her head.

  "Maddy here is my new friend! We both just had troublesome chicks leave the nest, and we have a shared appreciation for muffins at sunrise." The huge Fearow, Maddy, grinned and clattered her beak a few times. Right next to my moms face. My mom looked nervous for a brief moment, before the fear just… disappeared!

  Fearow ate people, mom!

  "Erin kind of ambushed her last night and she… from what I understand she was scared of Erin, but felt bad at the same time, so she gave her a ride." Maddy nodded, eyes glinting in amusement. Well, I guess that would explain how she got all the way down there last night, at least! What the hell, Erin!

  "She decided to stick around, and we've been chatting all morning. I've been thinking of making quite a lot of baked goods in the future… Coincidentally, I think I might make the switch from farmed to hunted meat." Her eyes glinted with humor, as did the huge ones right next to hers. I couldn't help the snort of amusement.

  "So she's going to be your Pokemon?" My mom nodded at me happily, tilting the camera to show an Ultra Ball already on the table.

  "I risked interrupting Erin's, ah, discussion with Looker, and she gave me one. Maddy is my Pokemon now, yes!" She looked so happy, but I started to laugh. Her face looked hurt as she pouted at me.

  "No, I'm not laughing at you, mom! I swear! It's just, usually parents get a Rattata, maybe a Growlithe or Meowth when their kids leave on Journeys. You know, a house Pokemon. I don't think most parents get an Alpha Fearow as a house Pokemon!" I started giggling again as soon as I finished speaking, and my mom and Maddy began to as well. Well, Maddy clacked her huge beak together.

  "That's true! I wonder if Maddy can help carry groceries home for me?" Her smile was light, and I couldn't help but laugh. The image of my mom walking down one of Pallet Town's small streets, an Alpha Fearow almost a story tall waddling behind her, tiny little bags held in her huge beak, popped into my head. That would be amazing, actually!

  "-fine then! Go- Just- Aagh! Fine! I get it. Sorry to ask you, Professor. I should have known. Seriously, I know I still sound pissed, but I am sorry I bothered you. I'm not- not thinking right. Thinking straight. Yeah… yeah, bye." My mothers camera dropped to show the table, but the call remained connected.

  "No luck, dear?" My mom sounded comforting, and I heard a huge sigh before Erin answered her.

  "No. I should have known he couldn't, even if he wants to. I feel so bad for even asking him, now that I know about… Victoria. Fuck!" I heard a slight scuffle.

  "Don't point your fingers at me, lady! I will not be flicked for being mad about this! No! Stop! Ow!"

  "You can be upset and not curse in front of me, Erin. What about Looker? You were asking him for something?" I heard a groan, then the sound of the chair sliding out.

  "I wasn't really asking. I begged him for something, anything. This isn't my world, Patricia, I don't know regulations or even what would be normal or possible." Wait, she just told my mom that! Looker was going to be pissed!

  "Well? What did he say?" A huge sigh.

  "He said 'I'll try.' That's it… I believe him, I do, it's just…" I heard her thunk her head off the patio table.

  "I want something good to have come from last night. Something other than preventing what was going to happen. I want the little notch I'm going to etch into my blade to mean something, Patricia. I'd rather not pis- infuriate my family and your darling daughter all for nothing." I felt a little bad as she said that, but no! Damnit, Erin! I watched you disappear into the darkness with two Pokemon!

  "I really, really don't want to have to put these Pokemon down, Patricia. I've had to put pets down before. Animals. Non-sapient, but still family. That's always hard, even if you're doing it for them. A life of agony isn't worth it. These Pokemon, though? They don't have cancers, or a degenerative disease. They're not so old that they can't walk anymore, feed themselves, not soil themselves. They're just… sad." I could hear her crying now.

  "They know that they're going to be put down unless I do something. That's part of how they keep Rocket Pokemon in line, according to Professor Oak. Fight to the death for your master, because all that awaits you if you fail is death anyways. Agony, or death? It's always that things words that come back to me." She took a shuddering breath.

  "I'm terrified that by the end of the day, I'm going to end a poor Pokemons life because I value my own and my friends and families over their possible future. These aren't wild Pokemon me or my mom hunted to provide for ourselves and our families. I don't feel bad for that, that's natural. That's part of the cycle, the pain is over fast, and it is natural to consume other organisms."

  "Plants feel and think too, they just do it differently, an- wait, what am I saying, there's walking onions down the road who talk. This is so much different. These are abused victims. How do I look into their terrified, hopeful eyes and say 'Sorry, but you have to die because another's actions determined your fate! Because I refuse to take a chance with my families lives!'" She got quiet for a moment before my mom spoke up, her finger tapping the table next to the phone a few times pointedly.

  "Erin, I know that no matter what happens, you're going to do the best you can by those poor things. What did you say, again? About your actions last night?" That was dirty, mom… I heard a sniffle before Erin muttered.

  "Which part? Where I don't regret a single one? The part where I didn't feel a thing as I killed a man? As I stood over mutilated, thrashing, screaming bodies? Which part, Patricia? The part where I'm a monster? The part where I would do it again in a heartbeat? The part where I broke your daughter's heart? When I flung poor Kallen away from me like trash, because I just couldn't take the glares? The blame?" Her voice was rising now, and I heard a low squawk from Maddy. I hadn't heard about the bodies. The… screams.

  "The part where I ran from my problems? The part where I betrayed their trust in me by running into a dangerous situation without them? How about the part where I basically mugged a wild Pokemon into flying me here?" An amused, scared squawk from Maddy.

  "The part where I broke down here last night? Or how about the part right now, where you do your best not to cower in front of the one you're trying to comfort?" Her voice was bitter, then her head thunked against the table.

  "I'm so sorry, Patricia…" Her words were sad, and I heard my mom release a huge breath.

  "Erin, dear… I'm not scared of you." A snort. "Okay, fair enough, Erin. I trust you, even if you scare me sometimes. Just like Leto. Or Maddy here. Or any Pokemon, really."

  "Yeah, but they're not human. I mean, I lucked out, huh?" She was growling now.

  "Like I said last night, I got monkeys pawed. My entire life I hope and pray and wish that I somehow magically wake up as a girl the next day. I fight to do it the hard way, in a society that treats those like me as subhuman… Then I get a literal act of god. Arceus, or much more likely Jirachi, yoinked my soul away when I died, and then tossed me into this world with the correct gender. Great!" Well, that wasn't something I had expected to hear. Not at all! Erin had been a boy? Or, trans, I guess? I wasn't… sure what that meant, entirely? I'd only heard the term in passing before.

  "I get my correct gender, hooray! Great! I'm also a kid again! Less great. Much less great. Then I get all this fucking dragon aura and all the sudden I don't even know if I'm entirely human anymore. How much is me, how much is my aura? I never had aura in my world, Patricia. I knew who I was then, but now? I have no clue who I am with all these additions. Now I kill a human for the first time, order multiple deaths, and I feel nothing! That's not natural! I'm some sort of twisted sociopathic dragon human monster. So you know what? Fuck it! Once again, none of that was my choice!" I didn't hear the sounds of flicks, and I grew worried.

  "I'm tired of not being able to make my own damn choices. So you know what I choose? I choose to lean on poor Looker with every bit of value I provided to him. I'll burn our fragile relationship to the ground if I have to. I know a personal carrying limit can be expanded all the way up to thirty, in certain situations. I also have a few ideas for… locations."

  "What do you mean by that, dear?"

  "I mean, if it comes down to it? I will carve my own little Ranch out off route. They really can't stop me." I heard my mom groan.

  "No, Erin, they very much can! Illegal Ranches are actually a pretty big issue!" An angry scoff.

  "I don't care. I'll make this work, Patricia. I'm making my stand here. I choose this. I'll evaluate every single Pokemon myself, with the help of a police Psychic. If I truly think they will be too dangerous?" She got very quiet, and I could hear the sound of Maddy's feathers rubbing together as she shifted.

  "Then I will put them to sleep the same way I put my animals to sleep. As gently as possible, surrounded by as much love as I can manage." Her voice was wet, and my mom took a few moments to speak. Her voice was soft.

  "All that, and you truly believe you're a monster, Erin?" The response was almost immediate.

  "You can be kind to others and still be a monster. The worst people from my world's history all had their own little thing that proved that every monster was still a human at the same time. One loved dogs, and he hated to eat meat. He felt it was cruel to deprive another being of life for food. He also ordered millions to their slavery and torture and brutal execution. In my world, all monsters were still humans at the end of the day. Here, too. It's what makes it worse." I heard my mother take a deep breath.

  "Do you think my daughter believes that? Does Leaf think you are a monster? Would she, if she knew all this?" Oh mom, that was so mean.

  "No, she doesn't… If she knew? Maybe. I don't… I want to say I wouldn't care, but I would. Your daughters like a fungus, Patricia. She grows on you, and she's a bitch to get rid of- OW!" Well duh, Erin!

  Also, I am not a fungus!

  "And me, dear? You don't seem to care about me knowing?" My moms voice was amused, and Erin snorted.

  "You're an adult. Technically, you're also my guardian, too, so… deal with it?" They both chuckled, Maddy clacking her beak alongside my mom. Then I heard Erin's PokeNav ring.

  "Finally! I'll go… argue over here, Patricia." My mom laughed in amusement.

  "Yes, if I can't hear the curses, I can't punish you, hmm?" I heard a faint chuckle. A few moments later my mom picked her PokeNav back up, looking at me with an amused expression.

  "Interesting discussion, my little fungus?" Oh hell no, mom!

  "I am not a fungus, Mom!" She chuckled at me before her face got serious.

  "Did you hear all that, Leto? Your newest daughter needed you and you pushed her away. You can be mad, just like me, but you fucked up, Leto." A huge growl from behind me. I gasped at her and she turned her frown on me.

  "If you think back, Leaf, I believe you'll find more than a few times you've endangered your own life and worried those around you." I felt my face heat up at her words.

  Once or twice, maybe…

  "You need to think about how your actions impact others, Leaf. Erin needs to do the same. I… honestly don't know what the correct thing to do last night would have been. Raihan alone, or even with Kallen and Hecate, wouldn't have been enough to capture them. To disable their vehicle, sure, but from what I understand it worked out so well because Erin was drawing their attention while Riahan took out the hostage guards before they could actually harm anyone." She sighed.

  "If Erin hadn't gone, Raihan might have died. He didn't have his team with him. If Erin didn't go, that means Team Rocket almost certainly gets away, while potentially killing your temporary mentor." She glared at the wall of scales behind me.

  "If the two of them hadn't risked their lives last night, dozens of humans and Pokemon would have been abducted, sold off on the other side of the world somewhere, never to see their families again. If Erin hadn't done all that, let that happen through her inaction, Erin would have broken, Leto, Leaf. You already knew all this, so I'm not so sure why you two are so upset? I have every right to be upset, but was I? Well, yes, furious actually, but I cared more. I comforted her." Her eyes were hard as they dropped to meet mine.

  "All of you need to apologize to each other. End of discussion." Leto began to growl, and my mom snapped her fingers. Leto's incredulous face slowly moved over to fit onto the screen. Well, mostly just an eye.

  "Erin is at fault, but so are you two! Apologise, sit down, and talk this out! I may be mad that Erin ran into danger, but she did the right thing keeping Leaf out of it! Discuss what happens in the future if something like this happens again! Make plans!" She sighed and leaned back.

  "Leaf, you're allowed to be childish when you're a child. Just take this chance to learn from your mistakes. Leto, you should have known better. Shame on you!" The glare was piercing on both sides of the screen before my mom looked back at me softly. There was a rising voice in the background, and it was coming closer.

  "I'm hanging up now, sweetie. I love you. You take care, okay? Call me tonight, actually." I nodded at her before I finally ended the call.

  Erin's Pokemon were all drooping. They had not been happy to find Erin completely gone last night, least of all Leto. Poor Kallen seemed to have been shunned last night, too, but they weren't ignoring him anymore. They all looked ashamed.

  Especially the gigantic face turning itself away from me at that moment.

  Me? I… didn't know what to think. What to feel.

  I had never felt so helpless, so weak in my life as I had watching Erin and Raihan's backs disappear into the darkness, just as the police picked up my call. Watching my otherworldly mentor and my goofy teacher disappear into the dark, two Pokemon between them.

  Raihan had estimated Kallen as a fourth or fifth badge level Pokemon. He had grown to his full Alpha size in one of the most competitive aquatic environments known, and even his family wouldn't have been enough to stop every attack. He had fought in the wild. He was easily Erin's strongest Pokemon, other than Leto. Cerberus could be stronger, if it was a physical attacker and he got a good Bite in, but Kallen was powerful.

  Hecate had apparently helped out the most with the Rocket Pokemon, convincing them to stand down, but she was barely full grown. She was easily Erin's weakest Pokemon.

  Those two Pokemon did not make an overwhelming force.

  I had watched the only two people in the world I would currently consider friends run off into the dark with their death looming ahead, and I had been forced to stand there. Watching. Helplessly.

  If Hecate hadn't been able to convince those Pokemon to stand down, Erin probably would have died. Then Raihan.

  How was I supposed to let that go? That feeling of betrayal, as I was literally left behind by my friends?

  Again!

  Still…

  If it had been anyone else I would be congratulating them, thanking them. They had done such a good thing! They had rushed in like heroes, and they had been!

  I really didn't know what I wanted. I wouldn't have wanted to go with them last night. I would have been useless, and they knew that. I have no doubt that if I had Fraxure with me they would have at the very least wanted to borrow him.

  "Maybe my mom's right? We all kind of screwed up." The winces that went around were fierce as my voice echoed in the quiet room.

  I sighed, throwing myself back on Leto. A knock on the door, and at my yelled response Raihan walked in.

  He looked like crap, like he hadn't slept all night. His clothes were disheveled, his eyes bloodshot, and he half-stumbled inside. He immediately searched around, and his head stopped.

  On Clefairy.

  "Leaf, Clefairy, I need your help with something." He seemed rushed, and I noticed that his luggage was already behind him. Mostly gift bags, it looked like. I looked at him in confusion.

  "Yeah, sure? You okay? You kinda-" He cut me off with a wave of his hand.

  "I'm fine, I'll sleep on the flight back! Listen, Erin's going to have to go to the police station today, to…" I spoke up as he trailed off.

  "I know. I just got done talking to my mom, they called her. Erin's trying to get Looker to do something. Maybe increase her carrying capacity." He winced.

  "Yeah, so I heard. She's obstinate on this one, too. She's calling in every favor she has with Looker, which… I mean, she used some of those already, but each one's still worth a lot." He looked uncomfortable. They had never told me what was supposed to happen in Galar…

  "Still, she's not going to let the police destroy them if she can help it, so she's getting her damn extension. However, how can you trust a Pokemon that doesn't, can't trust itself sometimes?" His expression grew grim.

  "You can't, unfortunately. Not fully, not truly, not ever, unfortunately. Unless… Unless we get a fae to mediate a true contract." His eyes were fearful as he looked at my fairy, and even Clefairy looked disturbed as she frowned.

  "It's rare to find a fae that can and will mediate a contract of their own free will, but it has happened. There are dozens of examples throughout history. The ancient Kings of Kalos would have their Florges mediate the oaths that bound their vassals. It's hard to rebel against your King when doing so would stop your heart." His eyes were even wilder now. Raihan hated fae topics.

  "If you're willing, can you mediate a contract between her and them? It just has to be basic, like 'you will be unable to move if doing so would bring someone harm' or something. I don't know! Let Erin deal with the fae shit! This will work, right? You can do it!?" He was practically begging in front of my fae now, her eyes wide and troubled.

  She held up a finger before she just… shut down, again. Eyes still open. It was just as creepy as last time, and I felt goosebumps form. I had cuddled with her not ten minutes ago, and now she creeped me out beyond belief.

  It was almost comforting, at this point, the emotional whiplash.

  She jerked upright, eyes finding Riahans even as they gleamed.

  There was suddenly the image of a huge mountain, then a dark cave full of Cleffa, Clefairies, and a few Clefable in my mind. Abruptly the images stopped. It had only taken a split second, but… those memories were too crisp. It felt like I could almost… reach out and touch that Clef-

  "Well, oww! Shit! Was that a communion!?" Raihan was wincing in pain, a tiny trickle of blood running from his nose, and I realized that I felt fine. Nothing at all like the previous two times I had talked to my fae. I looked at her, and she seemed barely winded by the effort.

  "You can't, but your… family at Mt. Moon can?" She nodded at me, still looking disturbed.

  "Will you take them there?" Raihans voice was soft and fearful.

  She looked at him for a long moment, then wiggled her hand back and forth, then shrugged. I knew what she meant, though.

  "She thinks she might want to, but she's not sure about the feeling. She's never had it before. She's never wanted to help another for no benefit to herself." She nodded at me and I smiled at her. It should have been horrifying, but if my horrific, ethic-less Pokemon wanted to be different, to try, then I would support her.

  "She'll do it, is what I'm sensing. If nothing else, it will be a different and interesting experience for her." She bounced a little as she smiled and I laughed.

  Raihan, meanwhile, looked horrified and relieved in equal measure.

  "You're getting to be as bad as Erin, Leaf. She's a dragon monster-" I winced at his words. "-but you're turning into a fae monster." His grin was weak, and it dropped off entirely when he saw the look on my face.

  "What's wrong, Leaf?" Should I tell him? Maybe not everything, but some?

  "When I was talking to my mom Erin came back, and my mom didn't hang up. She let me listen in on their conversation." He whistled.

  "Damn, that was devious. Good for her." I scowled at him.

  "Erin thinks she's a monster, Raihan. Maybe keep that word quiet if she shows up before you have to leave." He frowned.

  "Ugh, shes such a fucking child!" I elbowed him and he glared at me, continuing.

  "Leaf, Erin thinks she's a battle-hardened badass. She kind of is, I'm not going to lie, even though it was basically just two fights. I saw them from her perspective, lived them. It's a very, very different act to defend yourself than it is to launch an attack, though, no matter your target. Especially when they're human, and you can understand their screams." I winced and he nodded.

  "She did better than I did the first time I had to take a human's life." I jerked, lifting my gaze to his. His eyes were calm and sad as they examined me. Weighed me.

  "This isn't an idyllic world, Leaf. Chances are unfortunately high that you'll have to fight humans in your life, and they rarely give you the luxury of being honorable or merciful. There are no barriers in battle unless you make them. Kallen decimated an entire group of Team Rocket because Hecate was able to get their Pokemon to stand down. If she hadn't? Erin would have been dodging attacks from over a dozen Pokemon." So she'd have died. Even if the rest of them died to Kallen, too.

  "Erin fights everything the same, Leaf. Deadly serious. She might have been cruel when she said it last night, but she was right. You would have been a liability. You know that. You also know that Erin couldn't have done anything else differently, not and still be the same person. Neither you or Leto want to admit that you were wrong." She growled at him, but it was a light, weak thing.

  "So, before I leave, promise me you'll at least travel as far as Mt Moon and help her. Please?" His eyes were vulnerable, and I realized I had never seen them look that way. I nodded, swallowing heavily.

  "I don't… I don't plan on leaving her, Raihan. We just need to… talk, I guess…" He snorted.

  "Too bad we're up here. Let your mom mediate that one." He was smirking, but my eyes were thoughtful as I tapped away at my PokeNav.

  "Leaf, why do you look like you're considering it? She doesn't have a flying Pokemon, any Pokemon, and I know she won't ride in the basket." She wouldn't, no. She had refused the very idea of its existence, and tried not to watch as me and Erin had climbed in each morning to run to our training site.

  "Well… My mom got a new Pokemon this morning." He looked stunned and I gave him a wide grin.

  "So apparently last night, when Erin somehow got a flight to Pallet Town?" He nodded, mouth still wide. "She kind of intimidated a wild Pokemon to fly her there, and she was scary enough, and desperate enough, the Pokemon said yes…" He was starting to glare as I dragged the story out.

  "Well, she apparently loves my moms baking, and they really hit it off this morning while Erin's been arguing on her PokeNav. My mom's switched to purely hunted meat, by the way." His frown was thunderous, and I pulled my PokeNav out to show him the picture my mom had just sent me at my request. It was her, standing in front of Maddy, her wings spread wide, huge, dangerous beak right by my moms face.

  "Her name's Maddy, and they're apparently friends already? She's already caught her, too." His face! I could recognize shock easily, then fear, then shock again. It was like he was glitching! Finally he tore his eyes away from my device, disbelieving eyes meeting mine. I grinned at him.

  "She likes my moms muffins." He just stared at me for a second before he looked down at the ground.

  "Leaf. Your mom. Has an Alpha. Fearow." I nodded, smiling wide.

  "She's going to make the best house Pokemon! Well, backyard Pokemon. Although, maybe she could squeeze into the living room…" He groaned at me and I giggled.

  "I wasn't expecting it either! I'm just talking to her and all of a sudden there's a huge bird behind her! Erin apparently kind of ran into her last night, and, well… it's Erin. Soon enough she was flying a wild Alpha Pokemon of a hyper-aggressive species to my moms house in the dark." His groan just grew louder.

  "She's going to give me grey hairs! I'm not her father! She was older than me!" I couldn't help laughing at him. Raihan really had gotten the short end of the stick with Erin.

  I paled as I realized that it would be just us, so now I would somehow need to be the voice of reason.

  I suddenly wanted my mom.

  Now.