Sage returned home in the early afternoon peak of lazy heat and sunshine. When she stopped by the herbalism work shed to deposit the materials she had gathered, there was no one to be found working outside or in the shed. Sage had barely begun to turn the handle on the door into the house when it was yanked open from the inside and she was pulled into a flurry of questions by her three younger siblings. Won’t she tell them more about who she’s going to the festival with? Does she want some flowers for her hair? Does she need any perfume? Can’t they come with her? Does this mean she’s going to get married and move out? Can they have her stuff when she leaves? Sage did her best to just ignore them and listen only to her mother, instructing her that there was fresh water brought in from the well for her to wash up. Thankfully her siblings didn’t follow her out of the kitchen, although she could hear them arguing amongst themselves, dividing up the possessions they assumed she would leave behind when she moved out. Sage closed herself in the quiet bathroom and peeled her clothes off. They were that uncomfortable sort of sticky dry that only happens after sweat has evaporated in the sun.
As she scrubbed dirt and sweat off her body, she processed all that had happened already that day. She had met Ayala, a… spirit of the forest? A monster? Sage had heard tales when she was a child about Dryads, dangerous forest beasts who were half human and half tree. But they were tricksters, luring in the unaware to be devoured. And I obviously wasn’t devoured. Ayala had claimed that the people of the town had once made offerings to her regularly, and even named the town after her. That didn’t sound like a Dryad either. Could she be a minor God? Sage frowned. She wasn’t particularly familiar with the various Deities included in the Church’s official pantheon, but she knew there were several major ones and dozens of minor ones. She didn’t know whether it was even possible to meet any of those Deities, or if anyone had before. Her town only recently became large enough to have its own Church, and it was still under construction.
She slowly and gently untangled and washed her hair. Sage had been to that glade in her dreams, although Ayala seemed to indicate it was real somehow. She had heard of the Sign of Foresight sometimes manifesting as dreams of real places you had never been or of events that hadn’t happened yet, but she had never heard of that including bringing objects from the dream back with you when you awoke. That almost sounded more like the Sign of Creation - ending up with things you don’t know how to make or didn’t intend to create. But she hadn’t made the smooth stone, she just received it in her dream. Which part was the sign of her potential? Potential for what? Sage sighed heavily and dried herself off. She had finally gotten her chance to interact with magic, an opportunity for something more than the life she had now. And she had hesitated. She had felt too afraid. It was unclear how much of that fear was taught to her.
Vanilla, lavender, wild hazel. Sage inhaled the gentle, clear scent of the perfume she had made the previous day as she placed it strategically on her arms and neck, and worked some into her hair. It felt refreshing to be excited for the festival this year. Usually she felt awkward at large gatherings, especially at the Autumn and Spring Twilight Festivals where romance seemed to be such a particular focus. These were the only events where it was traditional for single people to wear particular colors, and she often found that any friends she went with ended up pairing off with other singles, leaving her alone in the crowd. She was looking forward to having someone stick with her through the evening, and to get to know Alex more. They seemed interesting, and Sage was curious about life in the city.
Dahlia and Daphne, Sage’s teenaged twin sisters, were all too happy to help Sage get dressed in the adjusted brown shirt and pants and red overcoat. Their help was completely unnecessary, but they saw it as the perfect opportunity to provide Sage with unsolicited dating advice. Despite being three years younger than Sage, they had vastly more dating experience. They were known as quite the matchmakers around town, and had actually set up several now married couples at past Twilight Festivals. Sage was relieved when her mother shooed them away and sat Sage down to style her hair. They sat in silence while Sofia brushed Sage’s hair. Sage braced herself for more unsolicited advice when the brushing stopped.
Sofia held a yellow silk ribbon over Sage’s shoulder, so that she could see. “What if I braid this in with your hair for tonight, Sage?” Sage just shrugged. Her mother took a deep breath and started work gently pulling the upper layer of Sage’s hair into a relaxed waterfall braid around her head, weaving the yellow ribbon in as a bright accent against Sage’s black hair. “You know, I wore this ribbon when I went to the Autumn Twilight Festival with your father for the first time.”
Sage rolled her eyes. “Mom, please. I’m just going with Sven’s cousin, they don’t even live in town. I’m not getting married any time soon.”
“I know, that’s not what I mean. What I’m trying to say is, did you know that was also the first time I went on a date with anybody?” Sofia persisted. Sage was surprised, but stayed silent. She hadn’t known that.
“I heard your younger sisters giving you all kinds of dating advice. All I’m saying is that I know it’s not always as simple as they make it out to be. I hadn’t really been interested in anybody before your father. I just never really connected with anyone.” Sage had never suspected this was something she would ever have in common with her mother, who was so outgoing and sociable.
“For some people, it seems like we just have a harder time finding that person we can emotionally connect with before we can find a romantic connection.” Sofia continued thoughtfully. “You’ve been taking your time, and I don’t want you to feel rushed. It’s okay to try and find out that this person is just a friend after all.” Sage didn’t know what to say, but she could tell her mother was getting uncomfortable with so much silence. “Just keep being yourself, okay?”
Sage nodded. She wasn’t sure how to tell her mother how reassured she felt without exploding from the awkward tension. So instead, she blurted out, “what if being myself means living in the woods like a hermit with a forgotten deity?”
Sofia laughed loudly and tied off the braid. “Well, as long as you write me letters and the deity is nice then I suppose that’s fine with me. There, all done!” She held up a small hand mirror for Sage to see her handiwork.
The braid was secure, but looked loose, and the yellow ribbon made the braid itself more clear. Her wavy hair would be held out of her face, but was still mostly down, falling just below her shoulder blades, and most importantly to Sage - felt comfortable. She generally felt more comfortable than she expected with her hair done and all dressed up. “Thanks, mom.” Sage turned and hugged her mother, who rubbed her back. “I’ll try and keep your siblings from harassing you too much at the festival.”
“So nice to meet you!” Sage heard her father’s voice, barely muffled by the walls between them. She felt her heart rate pick up. “Ah, that must be your date! I suppose if your father gets to meet them, then I should go introduce myself as well!” Sofia grinned playfully and left the room after patting Sage’s shoulder one last time. Sage swallowed hard and tried to take some deep breaths. She smoothed the front of her pants and shirt one last time.
Sage was relieved to find that Alex seemed at ease talking with her parents. They looked relaxed in their fitted brown pants and loose golden silk blouse. She did her best to ignore her father’s wiggling eyebrows and hurried Alex back out the front door as quickly as she could. But now, trying to figure out what a normal distance apart would be to walk with Alex she regretted rushing from one awkward scenario to another. Alex cleared their throat to break the silence.
“So, uh, what exactly is this festival that we’re going to?” Sage looked sideways at them. They seemed to be trying to decide if their hands should be in their pockets or not. “Surely Sven told you about the Autumn Twilight Festival before you came?” They shrugged and glanced over to meet Sage’s eyes. “Sure he did, but as we previously agreed - he can be kind of an idiot. Besides, I’d like to hear your perspective on what to expect when we get there.”
Stolen from its rightful place, this narrative is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.
Sage suppressed a smile and looked back up at the clouds, now with hints of warm hazy red with the sun just starting to set. “Well, the Autumn Twilight Festival is supposedly meant to be a final celebration of the year’s harvest before the weather turns cold and the days get shorter and darker. In practice, it’s more like a match-making free-for-all. People who are unattached wear red and gold colors, those who are not available usually wear more orange-y colors.”
“Oh, I see. So is it just like a big party or more formal, like friends and family try and get people set up together?” Alex seemed to settle on hands in pockets for now.
“A little of both. It just depends on the person. I’ve found that if you stick to the merchant stalls and children’s shows, you’re less likely to be approached than if you hang around the main dance area or the drinking tables.”
Alex laughed. “Now this is why I wanted your perspective! Sven didn’t even mention that there were shows and merchant stalls!”
Sage grinned and rolled her eyes. “Of course he didn’t! I don’t think I’ve seen him at the shows or stalls since we were kids. I really don’t understand why they even do the fall festival like this, isn’t the springtime supposed to be more romantic anyway?”
Alex tilted their head to the side thoughtfully. “I don’t know, I think it seems sweet. Late fall and winter always feel especially lonely and cold to me. It would be nice to have someone there with you through it. All cozy together inside. Then when spring rolls around and the weather gets warm, you have someone to re-explore everything with.”
Sage fixed her gaze straight ahead. “I guess I never thought of it that way. That does sound nice.” She swallowed hard. “Sorry, I hope I didn’t sound too mean about it. I don’t want you to think it won’t be fun, it’s just… sometimes it’s stressful for me, with so much pressure to couple up every year.”
She could see Alex looking at her in her peripheral vision. “I can get that. I’d probably feel the same if I’d been going to it my whole life.”
Silence drifted between them, only the distant sound of music and cheering lingered.
“Um, so, Sven said you’re from the city. He means Green River Crossing right?”
“Yeah, that’s right.” They chuckled. “It’s kind of funny to think of it as ‘the city’ though. I always think of the capital as ‘the city.’ I wonder what people living there would say ‘the city’ is?”
Sage smiled. “Yeah I guess there’s always somewhere bigger or more interesting than wherever you find yourself living. Almost anywhere could be ‘the city’ compared to here, but the Crossing is the closest I guess.”
“Well it’s funny to me though because it seems like we have a lot of the same problems and pastimes there. It seems like it would be really different, but I don’t think it really is.” Sage glanced at them with a furrowed brow, not following. “I just mean, sure, there’s more people, more stores, bigger festivals. We have a Church there and lots of people pass through from all over, so that’s really different I guess. But it still seems like, I don’t know - maybe I’m wrong. But we still have a couple different festivals, holidays, that some people live for and other people avoid like the plague.” One side of their mouth started to pull into a grin. “People there still have family problems, no matter how much they might love each other. Tell me if I’m out of line, but I feel like you and I have maybe the same problem even though it’s opposite. Like, it sounds like you feel pressured to couple up and settle down. My parents really don’t want me dating at all, even though obviously I’m an adult now. Ah, sorry, I kind of went in a weird direction.” They started to blush and looked at their feet. “I get a little rambly when I’m nervous.”
Sage felt relieved. “It’s okay, I’m nervous too. I think I get what you mean.” She watched a bunny dart across the path. “When I’m nervous, I talk a lot less. We’re kind of the same, but opposite.” She glanced again at Alex, offering a tentative smile. A verbal extended hand that they gladly accepted. They briefly met her gaze and exhaled a breath they had been holding, awkwardly laughing with relief. “So you met my family. They’re a lot. I know they want the best for me, but it’s a lot. You said your parents kind of have specific expectations for you, too?” She offered an invitation for them to vent their anxiety by talking more, and for herself to soothe by focusing on listening. She thought this arrangement might suit her just fine.
They looked up at the clouds, hands being shoved deeper in their pockets as if looking for something to hold on to. “My parents are super against marriage, actually. They both had a really rough first marriage that they rushed into when they were too young, and they both say that ever since they got out of those situations they don’t believe in marriage. Even though they’ve been together forever by now, they still won’t get married. They don’t want me to either. They want me to build a career, whatever that means.” Alex looked back down at their shoes, a more serious look passing over their face. Sage thought it must be the same expression she makes, sitting in the herbalism work shed seeing the same elixirs and potions stretching out ahead of her for the rest of her life. They looked back up towards her and she quickly averted her own gaze down to a small stone in the path, which she kicked ahead. “It must be kind of a relief, having a career laid out for you. Sven told me that your family has a really successful herbalism business, and that you’re a great herbalist too. Apparently the whole town relies on you.”
Sage felt a heaviness in her chest, tension building in her throat. Like a taut string being pulled further and further back in the center, waiting to see if it will break or snap back in place with painful force. “Actually, I don’t really know…” She swallowed hard. The last person she confided her doubts to was Sven, who hadn’t entirely betrayed her trust but had certainly twisted the knife of her fear whenever he could. “I don’t really know what I want.” She could feel her feet slowing down, growing heavier, despite her brain willing her to keep moving. She ventured a glance at Alex to gauge their reaction. They had slowed to match her pace, hands no longer in pockets, their expression somewhere between surprise, regret, and relief and focused completely on Sage. But no pity in their eyes, which relieved Sage. Her feet stopped, but her mouth continued almost of its own accord. “I feel really lost most of the time. I don’t know what to do.” Alex stopped and turned to face her directly, an intensity and seriousness in their face that Sage wasn’t prepared for. “It’s a lot of pressure and I don’t want to disappoint anyone, but-” She was interrupted by her throat closing. Her eyes stung but there were no tears, which she was grateful for. Her body and mouth had frozen but her mind was racing. Why had she trusted this stranger with such personal pain? The words had forced themselves out, like a dam overflowing with self-blame. And here, on her first actual date with an actual person not from this tiny village where everyone knew everyone, she had ruined it by making it dark and serious. Surely they would go back to Sven and say how weird and brooding she was, isn’t Sage so over-dramatic and angsty? Why can’t she just accept a nice, quiet, simple lot in life as a skilled herbalist in a close-knit town and-
“You feel trapped.” Alex’s quiet but firm voice cut through Sage’s internal tirade like ear muffs. “Me too.” The self-doubt and criticism was distant now, as she searched their face for any hint of mockery, of charitable disgust. She saw only a hurt on their face that she recognized. They just stared at each other in silence. Not uncomfortably, but there was nothing more needed to express their shared fear and relief that they weren’t alone in feeling adrift.
“You know, actually, my trip up here to visit Sven has a secret purpose.” Alex offered a small, playful smile. Sage cleared her throat, glad to take the escape from the depth and significance their walk had taken on. “And what’s that?” She tried to make her voice strong and clear, but some lingering tremors of vulnerability remained. “I am easing my parents into a much larger trip I’m planning to take, up to ‘the city’.” They grinned conspiratorially. Sage’s eyes went wide. “You’re going to go all the way up to the capital? To Ocean’s Throne?”
Their grin blossomed into a broad, excited smile. “Yep! And you know, I bet they’d feel a lot better if I wasn’t going by myself.” Sage couldn’t stop her mouth from dropping open in disbelief. “Not to rush you or anything, ah, I hope that wasn’t weird! I know we just met and everything, but I just, ugh, now I’m talking too much.” Alex buried their face in their hands and turned away from Sage, starting back on the road into town. Sage briefly considered reaching a hand out to their shoulder, but settled for simply following. “No, I don’t think it’s weird! I was just surprised - I have never left here before. Going all the way to Ocean’s Throne wasn’t something I ever thought I would actually be able to do.” She tried to be reassuring but noncommittal. Here was an opportunity to leave her small town, to see what the larger world had to offer. A journey with someone new, undoubtedly risky but thrilling, a chance to find out who she really is. But she still felt uncertain, fear and excitement mixing into an indiscernible mass of emotion churning in her stomach.
Alex groaned and glanced at Sage. “Ok well, let’s maybe see how this festival is before I end up inviting you to move in with me or something.” Sage laughed. “Ok, that sounds good to me. It would take me a few days to get all my things together to move in, anyway.” She offered her own attempt at levity, reorienting herself and hopefully Alex to the lightheartedness of the festival they were drawing very near to now. Peals of laughter and music could be heard drifting out of the constant murmur of the gathered crowd.
