"Even if you were the last man on Earth, I still wouldn't agree to go out with you!" the girl exclaimed, moving her body quickly away. Her speed was unattainable for Victor Lyffe's body, due to the greater attraction of Mother Earth, and he walked back to his home.

  The expected result, although it doesn't make it any more pleasant. But sooner or later he will find a girl who agrees to him, probability theory and statistics are on his side. The more he tries, the greater the chance of success. A few more and that's it, he can feel it.

  Victor is a bit overweight. Okay, just overweight. Even obese. But he is fighting for a slim body. Yes, the war is hard and some battles are lost. Most of them. The overwhelming majority. In fact, there are only partisans fighting in the forests, and only on official documents, so that the generals of the unhealthy lifestyle can pocket the money allocated to them for the fight.

  But he has a fail-safe (although for some reason it always fails. Probably need to find a better adjective. A bit of a fail-unsafe) weapon - charisma! Victor had a joke that still makes him laugh. "Acquaintance or life... without acquaintance!" was how he started and often ended his communication with the opposite sex. Perhaps he should think of a second joke. But with charisma it's important not to overdo it, lest you lose your true identity.

  At the moment, Victor was on his way home from work. He worked as an amusement ride operator, a great way to spend the day daydreaming. As always, he scanned the crowds for beautiful girls and sent them thoughts of benevolence. In the case of cherchez la femme, there is no point in not trying everything, including esotericism.

  As luck would have it, it was spring outside: the sun was shining benignly, painting the roofs with a golden light. There were puddles from the recent rain and shop windows were gleaming. The world, you can't be so obviously enjoying life when here's Victor walking all over you and spring hasn't arrived in his life yet. Victor blew his nose noisily on his sleeve. This allergy too...

  But she didn't tell the truth about the last man. Would agree. Who wants to cause the death of humanity? But there was some truth in what she said: he wouldn't have dated that woman because he would have found someone better. And he wouldn't have had time to date. He'd need a secretary to put women on his waiting list for months. And all this to save humanity.

  He also had to wait for the elevator from the top floor. When he came out on the second floor, as usual, he could not get the key to the apartment lock from the first, second and third time. Recently, the lock has often jammed and Victor has even had to call a locksmith twice. That's it, now it's official: today is a bad day.

  When Victor entered the flat, he found him. An outsider! A villain broke into the home! He was an oriental-looking man with rings and pearls in his black goatee beard. He wore a skullcap, a painted waistcoat that covered his naked torso, and baggy harem pants. Victor wasn't sure if he had identified the names of the clothes correctly and if he should call the harem pants 'baggy' (after all, they are always baggy, there are no narrow harem pants), but now he didn't care.

  The stranger was sitting cross-legged on his, Victor's, greasy sofa with a hollow in the middle, drinking something from his, Victor's, saucer for some reason. Against the backdrop of an antique sideboard, cars outside the window and a laptop covered in tape on the nightstand, he looked wild. Like a guest from an oriental fairy tale in a modern city. Although he looked appropriate with carpets on the walls and floor.

  Victor threw his whole body at the intruder. In the battle of the masses, Victor had an overwhelming advantage. But it turned out too overwhelming. He flew through the invader, taking only the saucer and breaking the sofa. Broke the saucer too.

  "Are you sick or something? Damn Shaitan!" shouted the massless man, as it turned out.

  "You broke into my house!" Victor shouted back, still lying on the smashed couch. And for a long time to come.

  "I am here to fulfil your wish. I am a djinn," the oriental man replied. He was now standing with his arms crossed in exasperation, tapping his shoulder with a finger.

  "Of course. Shall I rub the lamp for you?" Victor turned on his back to face the shameless eyes of the intruder.

  He looked at the table lamp in disbelief:

  "Why?"

  "You're supposed to be in it."

  "You are a fool. How can I sit in such a small thing? In that glass part over there?"

  "So it wasn't my idea for djinns to sit in lamps," the lying Victor said indignantly.

  "Ooooooh, what dense racial stereotypes," the self-proclaimed djinn picked up a teapot from the floor and began to drink from its spout. Then he stopped and asked: "I made some tea in the teapot, you don't against, do you?"

  The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

  "I am against all of you! Get out of my house at once!" Victor shouted, waving his arms and legs in a funny way.

  "Why do you need this house when you have a wish?" the intruder ran his goatee through his fingers thoughtfully. "Oh, I sense a slight misunderstanding between us.

  "A SLIGHT MISUNDERSTANDING? I'LL CALL THE POLICE!" Victor went into a hysterical state.

  "Calm down," the man held out his hand. "I'm going to demonstrate magic now."

  Before Victor could scream again, the djinn began to fly around the room. Then he flew up to the bulging-eyed Victor, took own head from his shoulders and threw it at the owner of the flat. He caught it and, as soon as it winked, dropped it to the floor and screamed:

  "AAAAAAAAA!"

  "Ouch, Shaitan! Drop your own!" the djinn's head returned to its place. "To be honest, you could have figured it out when you completely passed through my body."

  "In the entire history of mankind, particularly today, particularly I have just learned that magic exists!" Victor said, when he could stop shouting and start talking clearly.

  "No, of course not! Many people know, but they have all had their wishes fulfilled and are sitting there keeping their mouths shut," the djinn assured him.

  "But why me? And not... not... I don't know... my neighbour?"

  "So you have stunk up the entire psychosphere with your desire," the djinn said, sitting half a metre off the ground, his legs crossed again. "I can't bear it anymore. Well, are we going to do it or not? All I have to do is clap my hands and I'll be on my way to do the rest of my business."

  Victor licked his lips. It was supposed to happen today.

  "I want a world where there are no men, only women," he said.

  "There is such a small world. I'll do it in a jiffy," the djinn rejoiced. "But..."

  He waved his hand, and a rolled-up scroll appeared in it, the lower part of which fell down, revealing that the scroll was indeed a scroll. Or parchment. Victor didn't know much about that either. A luxurious quill with a needle at the end appeared in the djinn's other hand.

  "A tiny blood contract. Let's make it official. For reporting purposes, you understand," the djinn smiled innocently.

  "Is it really the djinn who sign contracts with blood?" Victor asked doubtfully.

  "This morning you didn't even believe we existed. And now you're an expert on djinn?" The djinn replied mockingly.

  Without thinking twice, and for what purpose, if he was going to agree anyway, Victor left a bloody squiggle on the contract and held out his hand to the djinn. He raised his open hand and slapped it hard, not Victor's hand, but his own. Another reality emerged aggressively from the familiar apartment.

  Victor stared around, dazed. He was standing on a street in a modern city where only women walked and looked back at him. There were no men! Except Victor, of course. So the djinn didn't cheat!

  The happy man walked down the street, basking in the attention and giving it in small doses. The women gave Victor surprised looks and kept their distance. The world of modest damsels. Some of them picked up their mobile phones and made calls. Contacting a government, no other way. Of course, such an important event today - he, Victor, is here!

  Victor was looking at a group of female police officers who were watching him warily when a black car of unknown make arrived and an Asian woman with short black hair got out.

  "A man?" she turned to the man.

  "Yes. The man is me!" Victor put his hands on his hips so she could get a better look at him.

  "What a big spread in the area," the woman decided for some reason to say this particular incomprehensible sentence. She could say any number of things, but of course the poor thing is in shock.

  "You're coming with me."

  "Are you from the government?" Victor decided to continue the conversation as he got into the car. He had never been in contact with the opposite sex for so long. His fingers tingled with anticipation.

  "Yes," the Asian woman said as she got behind the wheel.

  The drive was in what Victor might have called an awkward silence, but given the circumstances such a suggestion would have been absurd.

  "And how is this going to happen?... This process?" the man finally broke the not-so-awkward silence.

  "The process? What process? Like in 'Der Prozess' by Kafka?" the Asian woman was very focused on the road as she answered, as they passed through the junction.

  "I don't understand."

  "You don't have to understand anything, you have other things to do."

  "Ah, that's right," Victor paused happily for a while.

  "But still, how will the salvation of humanity by me would be going?" Victor interrupted again.

  "Don't worry, the process, as you said, is perfectly fine-tuned at the highest level," the Asian woman assured him, still not looking at him. Professional driver!

  "And here's another question..."

  "Here we are."

  Their destination was a large building. Inside, a woman in a lab coat immediately ran out to meet them:

  "You're late! I have everything ready."

  The lab woman changed the driver and led Victor through the building to a room with a thick frame and a pile of flashing devices with tubes and wires.

  "Take off your clothes and get into the capsule. There are holes for hands and feet," the scientific woman said.

  "It's for a health check, isn't it?" Victor realised as he followed the instructions.

  As he climbed into the capsule, the woman pressed a button that locked his limbs in place. Only then did she answer:

  "Yes, and to immobilise the donor."

  "Why?" Victor asked.

  "Why why? To make it easier to pump out the sperm. We need to pump as much as we can out of you during your lifetime. And this is the most effective way to do that.

  "WHAT!?" the donor shouted in a bad voice.

  "Don't worry, your muscles won't atrophy. We will stimulate them with an electric shock. And the levels of testosterone and other hormones will be artificially kept at a decent level.

  "I'M AGAINST IT!"

  "And I understand you. But the substance your body produces will allow you to support the survival of humanity. Know that your family will be large and numerous. But only of daughters. It would take too long to explain.”

  "LET ME OUT! I DON'T AGREE!" The saviour of humanity shouted.

  "And you need to lose weight. You see, you are too valuable a resource to shorten your life with harmful food," the woman took five cruel-looking tubes from the ceiling and looked at them thoughtfully. "I always confuse them, I should sign them, but no budget."