"Listen, I'm not saying that your flames are weak, I'm just saying that mine are hotter than yours." Fox folded his arms and waited for the rebuttal.

  "That's a bold claim, Fox," Captain Falcon replied. "But my flames are the hottest of anywhere in any galaxy. The heat of the Falcon can never be tempered!"

  Popo took his spoon of ice cream out of his mouth. "What are they arguing about now?"

  Marth sighed as he dug his own spoon back into the tub. "You know how both of them can summon fire for their attacks? They both think that they can make flames which are hotter than the other one. They've been talking about it for the last three hours."

  "Hmm." Popo stroked his chin. "You know, it could be interesting to find out. And if nothing else, it would stop them from arguing."

  "Ah!" They both looked alarmed at Nana, who shook her head at them to assure them that she was okay. "I'm fine. Brain freeze. But, they aren't the only ones who can make fire, are they?"

  Five minutes later, Mario found himself standing in a line with Luigi, Fox, Captain Falcon, Ness, and Falco. Popo stood in front of them, his arms behind his back like a drill sergeant.

  "Attention!" he called. "You are the mansion's best wielders of fire! Now, I myself prefer ice, the far superior element, but it seems that we need to be aware of who has the ability to generate the hottest fire. That's why we're introducing..."

  Nana leapt into the air, a crudely made banner unfurling behind her. Marth grabbed the other end and held it up sheepishly, allowing everyone to read "Fire Bowl One", which all three of them read out at once - Marth in a far less enthusiastic voice.

  "Are you ready to see once and for all who is the hottest?" Popo asked.

  Ness raised his hand. "Doesn't Princess Zelda also have the ability to use fire magic?" he asked.

  Popo blanched. "Yes," he admitted. "And we asked her to take part, but she said something about studying a casserole recipe and then when I tried to press her on it Link appeared and looked like he would cut me in half if I didn't leave her alone, so we'll do this one without her."

  "I don't see why a competition is necessary," Captain Falcon said. "Everyone with a brain knows that I'm the clear answer."

  "Yeah, in your dreams old man," Fox snapped.

  "Old man!?" Captain Falcon rounded on him. "I'll have you know I'm only thirty-six years old!"

  "Yeah?" Fox turned and leant down towards Ness. "Hey, you're human, is thirty-six old? I don't know how long your lifespans are."

  "We usually live somewhere between seventy and eighty years," Ness whispered.

  Fox's mouth dropped open. "Wow! So you must be older than I thought you were, to be still be a child!"

  "Yes," Ness agreed. "Wait, how old did you think I was?"

  "I don't know. One? Two? Two and a half?"

  "Twelve."

  Fox looked at him, surprised again. "Twelve..."

  "This is a pointless conversation." They all turned to see Falco standing at the end of the line. "Because I'm clearly the one with the hottest flames."

  "Well, hang on," Ness said. "My PSI flames are hot as well!"

  Mario leant over to Luigi. "Did we get involved in a whole thing?" he asked.

  Luigi shrugged. "I dunno about we, bro. Remember during our fight on the second day here? We found out then that your fire was hotter than mine. So, since we already know I won't win the competition, it's pool time for Luigi!"

  He turned and walked away. Mario looked at Popo for help.

  Popo shrugged. "He makes a fair point. Luigi is a known answer, but the rest of you aren't. That's why no-one gets to leave until we have our answer."

  Mario groaned. "Are you sure, because I had some things I wanted to do this afternoon."

  Everyone turned on him at once, and he got the strong impression that he was in this now. Curse his control over fire.

  "Well then, who wants to go first?" Nana asked.

  You could be reading stolen content. Head to the original site for the genuine story.

  Surprisingly, no-one raised their hand. Nana frowned. "You were all so enthusiastic a moment ago. What changed?"

  Falco grinned. "Well, I know I'm letting myself go last, so that we can end the competition on a high note. There's no way anyone can match up to me anyway, so why don't we just -"

  "Okay, draw straws," Marth said, holding out a cup with five straws sticking out of it. "Shortest straw goes first, okay?"

  "Okay!" everyone agreed. Everyone gathered around the cup and grabbed a straw.

  "Nice work, Ren Fair," Popo muttered. "You learn this from doing king things?"

  Marth rolled his eyes. "I wish. The people who I was in charge of back home were way easier to organise than these guys."

  Everyone drew their straws at once and held them up to compare. The order ended up being Falco, Mario, Ness, Captain Falcon, Fox.

  Falco ran a hand through his feathers. "Well, it looks like we're about to peak early. Stand back everyone, and witness the might of my Falco F-"

  "Wait!" Mario yelled. "Maybe we shouldn't do this inside the mansion?"

  Nana and Popo exchanged a look. "That's exactly what we were about to suggest," Nana said. It was a very obvious lie.

  They reconvened three minutes later in the yard, away from any of the potentially flammable parts of the garden. They had wordlessly decided not to go to the stadium that Master Hand had given them, even though it would probably have been ideal for this purpose.

  "Okay, now we can start," Marth said, once he was sure that the entire structure wouldn't be set on fire. "Falco, show us what you got."

  Falco grinned as he stepped forwards and ran a hand through his feathers. "Well, looks like we're about to peak early. Stand back everyone, and witness the might of my Falco Fire!"

  Flames erupted from the soles of his feet and coated his entire body. He held himself in place for a few seconds, before leaping off the ground and streaking through the air like a miniature comet. The flames around him burned away and he hung in the air for a second. He twisted, landed on on leg, and spread his arms.

  "How was that for you?" he asked.

  Popo nodded. "That was..." he looked over at Nana, who finished "...pretty hot!"

  They both looked at Marth, who sighed. "But can anyone be hotter?" he asked, with far less enthusiasm.

  Mario stepped forwards next. "Well, since I'm here I'll do my best," he said. He held his hands out, and generated a ball of fire in each palm. He let them burn for a second, then slammed the two flames into one another. The fire raged and tried to escape, but he held them in place as they got hotter and hotter. He felt like there was something brewing - some new technique at the end of this path - but he realised that as he was now there was no way he could reach that level of heat. When the fire got too hot for him, he threw the fireball into the air and let it explode.

  "Wow!" Ness said. His face lit up with a huge grin. "That was the hottest it's ever been, right?"

  Mario shrugged. "I dunno. I hadn't thought about it much."

  "Well, that was a strong showing," Nana announced.

  "But will it be enough for victory?" Popo asked.

  "Ness is up next!" Marth sounded like he was enjoying himself far more this time.

  Ness walked forwards. "I don't know if I can match that," he said. "But I'll do my best anyway." He raised his hand with two fingers outstretched. "PK Fire!" he yelled.

  Flames erupted from the tips of his fingers. They crackled and made as though to escape from where he was holding them, but every attempt to break free was foiled, as though something was holding them in from the outside.

  The flames glowed brighter and brighter as the heat increased, while Ness's arm began to shake from the force of holding in it place. He grimaced, and aimed his hand at a nearby rock before letting it go. The fire leapt from his fingers and struck the rock, and it exploded, sending chunks of rock flying.

  "Wow!" Popo said. He looked at the piece of smoking stone at his feet. "That was impressive. But -"

  "But now we're coming close to the end!" Marth exclaimed. Everyone looked at him. "Sorry. I was getting excited."

  Captain Falcon took a step forwards. "Well, it's my turn now. Stand back everyone, it could get a little muggy."

  "Hold on!" Fox stepped forwards and glared at Captain Falcon. "I'm sick of waiting. Let's you and I go at the same time! Head to head!"

  Nana gasped. "A challenge extended! How will the challenged one respond?"

  "You're on," said Captain Falcon. He drew back his fist and flames began to dance around it. They rose quickly, so fast that everyone besides Fox had to step back for their own comfort.

  Fox began to heat up as well. Flames emerged from his feet, but they moved more slowly than Falco's had done, rising slowly to cover his whole body in a raging flame.

  "Wow!" Mario threw up his hand to stop his moustache from burning off his face. "They both had all that!"

  "It's the spirit of competition," Marth realised. "Each one is pushing the other further than he possibly could have gone on his own!"

  Falco shrugged. "I could go hotter." But he still took a few steps back with the others.

  Captain Falcon met Fox's eye. "You seem to be doing pretty well so far. But how do you do against this?" The flames around his fist doubled in size and began to spill off his back. The Captain was standing on the edge of a raging inferno which all stemmed from his right hand.

  Fox grinned. "You call this hot? I'm still getting warmed up, old man." His own fire also doubled in size, even beginning to turn blue in places. He rose slightly off the ground, just enough that he was now eye to eye with Captain Falcon.

  Captain Falcon roared: "I'm only thirty-six!" His flames turned into a giant burning falcon, which raised its head and screamed with a voice made of fire.

  "That's old to me!" Fox yelled back. His fire became a huge fox made of fire, which bellowed at the falcon. The two animals stared one another down, then slammed into one another. The flames turned into a giant spiral of heat, forcing everyone to dive behind the rocks.

  The flames slowly died down. Popo crawled out from behind the rock that had hidden him. "Well, that was everyone's entry, folks," he said. "That's the end of our show!"

  The air was still hot. Fox and Captain Falcon were still staring one another down, but they each swayed on their feet slightly.

  "So... who won?" Fox asked. "Whose fire was hotter?"

  Nana made a choking sound. "Oh no," she said. "We forgot to come up with a way to actually measure the heat."

  "Wait." Captain Falcon looked at her. "Are you saying that this whole thing was pointless?"

  Nana nodded. "Sorry."

  Everyone collapsed. Marth alone stayed on his feet, looking around at the others. "Well, I had a good time," he said. But no-one else was getting up, so he decided to just lie down on the stone with them. It was very warm - very relaxing actually. They would stay there for quite some time.