Chapter 45: Winner Winner Chicken Dinner

  “Oh, that just figures,” Darrin snapped, looking over Kiavi’s shoulder at the contract. “Screw this. I’m going home.”

  Several of the others grumbled similar sentiments before Melvin cleared his throat. “What do you guys want as a prize?”

  “Who is this kid?” Michael asked.

  “That’s Merlin Junior,” I replied with a chuckle. “He really can reward you. He’s lord of the universe, or something like that.”

  “I prefer Emperor,” Melvin said, sticking his tongue out at me. “I started Meltopia back in Celestea, but now it governs the entire universe. Anyhow, that’s not important. Nobody calls me that. Alex is right, though. I can reward you. Within reason, of course.”

  “Show me the money!” Darrin said, smiling for the first time since I met him.

  Melvin sighed. “Very well, come with me.”

  The next thing I knew, we were back in the void, having been pulled there by Melvin.

  “I’m going to take them to Origin,” he explained. “Do you want to come? I’ll understand if you have things to do on Gaia. You can always visit later if you like.”

  I thought about it. The only thing I could think of that needed doing was facing the wrath of Aura, and returning to Albion to let everyone know I survived the apocalypse. That could all wait a couple of hours.

  “I’ll go,” I replied with a grin.

  “Okay,” Melvin matched my grin.

  Melvin led me to through the void to a golden planet orbited by a single dark moon. He zoomed in to the largest structure on the planet, a tower that rose through the clouds. The building opened up and he selected a tiny room just outside of a sprawling throne room.

  The room we appeared in had several items resting on cushioned pedestals. One stood out immediately.

  “Hey!” I gasped, rushing over to a very familiar bloody sports bra. “I wondered what happened to this. Isa was wearing it when she died. How did you get it?”

  Melvin shrugged. “My dad collected everything in this room.”

  “So, do we just pick one?” Kendra asked, eying a shimmering necklace with particular interest.

  “No,” Melvin replied, walking over to prevent the girl from picking it up. “Not these. Some of them might be cursed. Alex, you can take that one since you know what it does.”

  I tipped the bra into my bag, but couldn’t help notice Melvin fidget with his ring and look at another empty pedestal before proceeding into the next room. A pair of massive double doors opened into a large room with a red carpet and a single chair at the end. Lining the sides of the room were alcoves that looked like poolside patios in a fancy hotel. Beautiful women stretched out on lounge chairs sat up as our procession passed.

  Kalli glared at the women and took Melvin’s hand possessively, speaking only in mate chat. I don’t see why they still need to be here.

  Melvin gave what he hoped was a reassuring smile. I can’t just kick them out. You know it’s a process.

  And why can’t they stay in their rooms? Kalli shot back.

  Melvin was at a loss. Kalli knew perfectly well that he didn’t want to restrict them during the relocation process. With his father, Merlin, suddenly gone, a lot of them were showing signs of PTSD. The last thing he wanted to do was place useless restrictions on them and cause even more stress. Besides, Kalli had unfettered access to his soul. She knew full well he only had eyes for her.

  We continued through the throne room to a special elevator at the back. It was a quiet ride to the top floor, which opened to what looked like a hoarder’s bedroom. Melvin kicked a basket out of the way as he led us through stacked piles of junk.

  “Is this your room?” Carlito asked, eyeing the mess.

  Melvin laughed. “No! This was dad’s room. There’s nothing interesting in here. Trust me, I checked.”

  Beyond the room was a bathroom, complete with a garden tub and sauna.

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  Darrin chuckled. “Are you serious right now? Merlin’s bathroom was bigger than his bedroom?”

  “I’m sure he spent more time in here,” Melvin said, not looking back.

  A door in the back led to a walk-in closet. It wasn’t particularly fancy, with several pinstriped business suits along one side and traditional blue wizard’s robes on the other.

  Kiavi sniffed one of the robes. “Is this what you were hoping to use as a prize? It’s not even clean.”

  Melvin moved aside several of the suits to reveal a ramshackle wooden door. He placed his hand on the knob and closed his eyes. A series of metallic clinks came from the door that reminded me of a bank vault before it snapped open with a hiss of escaping air.

  “Woah!” Michael had to hunch over to squeeze through the tiny doorway. “You have a money bin in the back of your closet.”

  The room appeared much too big to exist in the confines of something like a tower, much less at the back of a closet, which was itself at the back of a bathroom of a dirty old bedroom. Although gold coins from multiple worlds filled the room, certain items sprinkled here and there caught my eye.

  Melvin invited everyone into the vault with a sweep of his hands. “So, I’m thinking the winner should get their pick of anything in this room.”

  “Wait,” Kiavi hissed, glaring at me. “What do you mean, winner? You didn’t bring us all the way out here just to give Alex all the loot, did you?”

  I’d had enough of the competition, and I sighed theatrically to show it. “It’s fine. You can disqualify me.”

  Kaliphae patted me on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. You can call this the runner’s up prize. We will reward Alex later.”

  “But how do we decide who won?” Michael asked.

  “That’s a good question,” Melvin replied. “Any suggestions?”

  We all stood in silence for several seconds before Primith spoke up. “How about a scavenger hunt?”

  “A sca…?” Kendra mouthed out the rest of the word. “How are we going to do that?”

  Primith produced a wood coin that looked remarkably like the gold ones. “I’ll hide this somewhere in the room, and whoever finds it wins.”

  “That’s no fair,” Alan pointed out. “You’re either disqualifying yourself or setting yourself up for an easy win.”

  She shrugged. “It’s fine. I already got my reward.”

  Everyone gaped at her for a moment before Alan spoke up. “That works for me. What about the rest of you guys?”

  It took a little convincing, but everyone eventually agreed. They would do Primith’s scavenger hunt. We were all herded back into the closet so Primith could hide the wooden coin.

  “How do you know she’s not robbing you blind right now?” Kendra asked Melvin, folding her arms across her chest.

  Kaliphae laughed. “You don’t want to test the security system in there. It’s quite painful.”

  Nobody said anything else before Primith opened the door. “Okay, it’s all set. Good luck everyone.”

  The other players all fought to cram through the tiny door, leaving me, Melvin, Kaliphae, Kiki, and Alariel alone in the closet.

  I inspected the wizard’s robes. “You’re sure these aren’t alive, right?”

  Melvin laughed. “Yeah. I don’t think Merlin intended for anyone to wear that cursed thing that Donn was in. I found it in a museum on Earth and it latched onto me. I was only rid of it when I shoved it down Rasputin’s throat.”

  “And that almost ended the universe,” Kaliphae replied, playfully slapping Melvin on the shoulder.

  “Hey!” Melvin whined. “I thought he’d just killed you when I did that. My universe had ended.”

  Kaliphae kissed Melvin, so we gave them some space and ducked back into the treasure room.

  Primith stood by the door and nodded to me. “This is probably going to take them a while.”

  “Where did you put it?” Kiki asked.

  Primith rolled her eyes. “The last place they will look.”

  Gold flew this way and that as the players sifted recklessly through the haphazard piles of gold. Primith chuckled and walked over to one of the magic items strewn about the room, picking it up.

  Toy Sword: Excalipoor

  Rank: B

  Attack: -1

  Special: Can take on a special appearance when mana is applied.

  This item is special. The transformation is tuned to each person’s unique mana signature.

  “Try it,” I said, winking at Primith.

  She stared at me. “Try what?”

  I grinned. “Use mana on it.”

  “Oh,” she said, closing her eyes to focus.

  The toy sword glowed before transforming into a long vine whip with wicked looking thorns.

  “Try it on me,” I said, holding out my good arm.

  Primith marveled at the whip. “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah,” I replied. “At least, I think so. The damage on this thing is negative one. How bad can it hurt?”

  “Don’t make me regret this,” she sighed, winding up to lightly slap me on the wrist with the whip.

  As expected, it tickled.

  “See!” I exclaimed, holding up my uninjured hand for proof. “Now, do it for real.”

  “Okay,” she replied, letting out a sigh only a mother could make. “It’s your funeral.”

  This time, she made a show of cracking the whip a few times before lashing me hard against my arm. Again, it tickled.

  Primith whistled. “Not bad, a child safe toy.”

  “Let me try it,” I said, reaching out for the whip handle.

  Primith handed it over. The moment my mana entered the whip, it started to transform. At first it became a sword, but then it grew until it was at least as tall as I was. I laughed when I realized it was a replica from one of my favorite video games.

  “You are not trying that thing on me,” Primith said as she slowly backed away.

  I laughed. “It doesn’t hurt. It tickles.”

  We continued to play with various items we discovered while the others grew more and more frantic trying to find the coin.

  “Why doesn’t the anti-theft magic shock us when we pick stuff up?” I asked while looking through a monocle that made everyone look like cartoons.

  “Who says the trap shocks you?” Kalli asked, giggling. “It’s far worse than that. And you aren’t stealing it until you try to get it out of the closet.”

  I was sorely tempted to test the magic but didn’t get a chance when the others stomped up looking scandalized.

  “This isn’t fair!” Kiavi protested, her tail sticking straight up in the air. “How are we supposed to find one fake coin in a mountain of real ones?”

  Michael huffed. “Yeah! It’s like finding a needle in a haystack, literally.”

  “Who said I hid it with the other coins?” Primith asked. “You all just assumed that.”

  There was a chorus of groans as they started looking in places not flooded with mountains of gold.

  Melvin sighed. “Is there any way we can speed this up?”

  “Fine,” Primith said, waving her hand at the vault door.

  The wooden coin, which was perched on the doorsill, floated up in the air and fluttered about the room.

  “Whoever catches it, wins,” she announced.

  Everyone was off to the races, sprinting after a magical flying coin that just managed to elude them. We watched in amusement for a while before Primith got bored and let the coin fall to the floor. From there it was a dog pile, or cat pile in Kiavi’s case, while the players fought desperately to determine a winner.

  In the end, the coin floated back into the air, dancing playfully before Carlito appeared holding it.