That’s a weird book

  The two walked down the winding stairs. Jerry pointed out various things as they moved. Kato listened intently as the man spoke. He would need to glean every bit of information from him as possible if he was to succeed. It was how he liked to work as a thief. Get as much information as he can before breaking in. Usually, this meant casing the place for several days, monitoring the comings and goings of people, and optimising several paths through and out of the building.

  This strategy was a little bit different. He’d rarely had the opportunity to ask detailed questions to a resident all the while planning to rob them. Sure, it had happened before, but that hadn’t gone so well. Kato shook his head. ‘Best not to think about that.’ It had been the heist that had led him to a smiling Jeb. He shivered. That had not been fun.

  “Problem?” Jerry asked, interrupting his thought.

  “What? Oh, sorry, no problem. I was just thinking. This place is, like, really big.” Kato smoothly recovered.

  Quizzically, Jerry tilted his head and looked at Kato. He frowned slightly, then laughed. “I suppose it is. I guess you don’t see many buildings this big on the outside.”

  Kato nodded his head in agreement. ‘Get it together! The building’s big? Really?’

  “Not really,” Kato muttered before switching the subject. “So, you’re some type of tour guide?”

  “In a way,” Jerry said softly.

  The pair reached the bottom of the stairs and began walking across the vast room they found themselves in. Panelled wooden walls and towering bookshelves lined the walls. End tables and sofas were dotted around the place. It looked very cosy for a church that was allegedly built on suffering.

  Jerry watched Kato’s expression. “I see you’re wondering about the décor. Doesn’t seem very suffering-esque, does it?” He laughed slightly.

  Kato tightened his facial muscles, forcing a more neutral expression. ‘He’s perceptive. ‘Be careful.’

  “I'm not sure.” Kato turned to regard the man. “Perhaps some people find suffering in comfort?”

  Jerry let out a booming laugh. “No. Nothing as outlandish as that.” He took a deep breath before laughing again. “What kind of person would view comfort as a source of pain?”

  Kato’s face burnt. “Yeah, I guess that would be pretty weird.”

  “No, the real reason is something far more mundane, I'm afraid. The top brass have got it into their heads that basic pleasures and downtime make the suffering more effective when it happens.”

  “I guess that makes sense.” Kato looked over to the desk. A man in a grey robe pushed it to the side. His eyes widened in shock.

  “Do you know that guy?” Jerry asked him.

  “No. It’s just, can he do that? Move the sofa?”

  A smirk tugged at Jerry’s lips. “I see you met Darren on your way in.”

  Kato ruefully smiled.

  “Well.” Jerry continued. “You don’t have to worry about Darren here. His custodial duties don’t apply to the communal areas.”

  Kato let out a sigh of relief.

  Jerry laughed slightly. “Don’t be like that. Darren’s a nice guy. An important one too. As long as you didn’t viciously assault the guy when you first met him, he’ll probably forgive you.”

  Kato fought to not let his reaction to Jerry’s words show. ‘He deserved it.’

  Stolen story; please report.

  “I'm glad to hear that,” Kato responded.

  The two fell into a comfortable silence as they continued to walk forward. Jerry stopped in front of a bookcase before pulling out a worn leathered book. It had a long, flowing script emboldened on the top. “Pretty cool, huh?”

  Kato looked at the cover. That was its title. He laughed politely at Jerry’s joke.

  Jerry looked at him with a serious expression. “Come on, man. I'm trying here. You’ve just joined the church. Some people try to get in for years, and you’re barely even reacting. Smile, dude.”

  Kato forced his mouth into a smile. ‘Yes, Jerry, I'm really glad I joined a group of evil cultists.’

  Wisely, Kato chose to keep his thoughts to himself. “That’s an odd book name. What’s it about?”

  “Oh.” Jerry looked down suddenly at the book in his hands as if surprised by it. “It’s interesting the main character gets killed in the first chapter, though. The book follows him, but honestly the main character's pretty weird. He acts strangely and doesn’t talk so well. I recommend it.”

  “I’ll keep it in mind. Thanks,” Kato politely told Jerry. ‘That sounds terrible. What type of author kills off the main character?’

  Jerry returned the book, then sat down on a nearby sofa.

  Kato flinched. Thankfully, Darren didn’t materialise. He had been told he wouldn’t, but it was always nice to have some reassurance.

  Kato sat down beside him. The sofa caved under him, moulding to his form. Jerry was right. It was comfy. “What are we doing here?”

  Jerry looked at him, surprised. “They didn’t tell you?”

  Kato thought back to his interactions so far. Ignis kept trying to hurt him because he would enjoy it. Patchy kept mocking him. He had upset a piece of sentient paper. And a black void had tried to engulf him. Then, a random woman had attacked him with a fresh set of robes. “You know. I don’t think they did,” Kato laughed awkwardly. “They probably forgot.” ‘Or they thought it would be funny,’ he added in his head.

  “Maybe,” Jerry answered unconvinced.

  “Do you think I'm lying?”

  “No – I just. Eugh. Sorry. I don’t know why I said that. I imagine it's been quite stressful for you since you got here.”

  “You do think I'm lying!” Kato stood up. He wouldn’t let this man besmirch his good name.

  “Easy.” Jerry raised his hands in surrender but remained sitting. “I didn’t mean to offend you. Most people know how to take a joke.” A small smirk tugged at the dastard’s lips.

  Kato sat back down. “You’re not funny. How’s that even supposed to be a joke? You just said I'm crazy with a straight expression.”

  “Well, to be completely fair, you probably are. You didn’t even properly laugh when I pulled that book out.”

  Kato’s eyes narrowed, locking onto Jerry. “Your book joke was very funny.”

  “I know.”

  Kato’s eyes narrowed further. “Why are we here?”

  “They didn’t tell you?”

  Kato glowered at the man. They had just gone over this.

  Jerry sighed. “You’re no fun, dude. Show some life.” He paused. “As to why we are here, we are waiting.”

  Kato waited for the man to continue. He didn’t. “For?” Kato finally prompted him.

  Jerry smiled a wicked smile. “I'm glad you asked. We’re waiting for an appointment with medical. You’re pretty sick.” He looked at Kato and awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. “I saw your sheet.”

  Kato watched the man with distrustful eyes. ‘Why does everyone keep saying I’m sick? I don’t feel sick. I feel stronger than I ever have!’ Unfortunately, Kato wasn’t a doctor, and on top of that, he didn’t even know what a status sheet was. ‘Wait. Isn’t sick another word for cool… ‘Have they been complimenting me this entire time?’

  He looked back at Jerry. “I am pretty sick. Thanks.”

  Jerry looked at him strangely. “I know that’s why we are taking you to a doctor.”

  ‘Right. He did say we were going to see a doctor. He probably didn’t mean sick as in cool. But… these guys were pretty strange.”

  “Hey, just checking. By sick you meant ill. Right? Not cool.”

  Jerry rubbed a hand over his face. “Why would I look at your status sheet, get concerned and call a doctor to see you because I thought you were cool? How does that make sense?”

  “Haha,” Kato actually said the words. “I got you good. It was just a joke, dude.” He turned his face away, hiding it from Jerry.

  Thankfully, they didn’t have to wait long.

  “Katolla?”

  Kato looked up.

  A tall, lean woman with wavy blonde hair waved at him.

  “Hi, I'm Eva.” Her dimples deepened as she smiled at him kindly. Her fair skin was freckled by small brown dots, and her lips were a plump red.

  “Hey,” Kato stammered, patting himself down as he stood. “I didn’t think you’d be so – doctory.”

  Her soft hazel eyes twinkled. “It comes with the job.”

  She was the first person Kato had seen who didn’t wear a robe. Instead, she wore some kind of white flowing jacket with a silver name tag that had the name Eva printed on it affixed to her chest.

  “Well,” she said, after Kato didn’t respond. “Why don’t you follow me, and we’ll have a look at what’s been bothering you?”

  Kato looked back to Jerry, who remained sitting. The man waved him away. “I’ve got places to be. See you around, kid.” He looked towards Eva. “Careful. This one’s got no sense of humour.” He turned and began to walk away.

  Kato glowered at his back. ‘Maybe have better jokes, Jerry.’

  “Katolla,” Eva prompted again, more gently this time.

  Kato turned back. “I’m ready. Let’s go.”

  They stepped through a narrow doorway into a quieter corridor.

  “You don’t feel sick, do you?” she asked softly.

  “No,” Kato answered honestly.

  Something flickered in Eva’s eyes, but she didn’t stop smiling. “Interesting.”

  Chapter 1

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