My pleasant evening among the gang was quickly ruined upon being woken up to Dillee standing over me, smiling away.

  “Dillee…how long have you been standing there?” I asked him, trying to be as non-weirded out as possible.

  “Since I sensed sunshine outside, sir. Four hours exactly!”

  Ah, jeez, is he going to be one of THOSE types, I thought. Standing up and stretching I walked out of the tent and he proceeded to follow me like a blue ass fly as my father would say.

  Wardi and Rhua were already at the entrance to the underpass, waiting to leave. Lucy was outside the tent, still finishing off breakfast. So, I told Dillee to go wake him.

  “All set for today, Luce? I’ll be missing you, my favourite Haberdashphylacterist.” Smiling at her. She choked on her food a little, which is not my fault, let’s face it.

  “Of course! I hope we aren’t separated for too long. I do not want to send Rhua on a hunt to come find you.” Lucy cackled upon saying this.

  “I can’t believe you’ve said this, you’re the cruellest Hatcot ever. Friendship betrayal of the highest order. See this heart?” I said to her whilst pointing at my heart.

  “It cracked from your attack.” Walking away from her, I heard her vicious putdown once more, “Shut up, MC!” in the background. I’m too hurt to deal with this right now.

  “Good luck today, both. I mean it.” I’m beginning to feel the anxiety set in, I’m so used to being around them both. Wardi walked over and fist bumped me, and Rhua gave me a slap on the ear.

  “You look after them two, it’s dad mode time. You have a 24-year-old and a sapling that just turned eight days old in your care. Their sister will be upset if the older one gets hurt.” Rhua teased me, but joke's on her when she gets herself struck off my festive card list.

  “Yes, madam Seisyll, please don’t return any sooner than you must. I wish to keep my chakra alignment level.” I replied with a cowardly tone and bowed to her.

  “HA!” Wardi was a fan of that one for sure. Rhua just pulled a face. I keep telling everyone, you just can’t touch these moves, zing-zing-zingeroni!

  Horace missed the sendoff and came out of the tent sulking. Special little sausage ain’t he. He needs some cheering up.

  “Come on, lad! It’s the boiz day out…or days, depending on how much of a mess this turns into. Get synthing, you’re the key to our success.”

  He cheered up after a little verbal pep talk. Aided by Dillee, who was gently tapping him on the hip. He is barely 3ft tall after all. Hey, that rhymed!

  Since I hadn’t bought shit in a long ass time, I figured maybe one of those refugees may have something I’m after. Tanner was nearby, and I asked him. Who directed me towards Bream Scaq, who berated Dillee.

  “Hey pal, Tanner back there said if anyone has something to trade, it’s probably you.” His eyes lit up; this guy wants some of my fine ass coin.

  “What are you in the market for?” rubbing his hands together, and it got me thinking, how badly does he want to rip me off right now?

  “Empty bottles. You got any?”. He was not expecting me to ask him that. An empty bottle…isn’t exactly going to be easy to con someone over.

  “I got two of these glass ones I can spare, but I DON’T WANT HFC.”

  Fook sake mun, can we catch a break already. I thought before replying, “What are you after, bud?” Trying to be as fake interested as possible.

  “Something I can flavour our food with, I’m tired of this bland as hell shite I’m feeding everyone here…I want tantalised taste buds, you know what I mean?”

  Jackpot, I thought, whilst pretending I didn’t have exactly what I needed, a few hundred steps behind me.

  “Ah dritt bud umm. We’re not the most food-focused group if I’m honest. It’s the high-calorie life for us.” I stood there acting like I didn’t know what to suggest. And then…EUREKA!

  I slapped my face pretending like I just remembered something, “Of course! I’ve got just the thing. I’m gonna need a container to fill it up with, though. The box we had it in is kinda broken, this great stuff from the eastern lands - It’s called Drooli, you’ll love it mate, trust me.”

  MC had managed to get him right where he wanted. “Right, uh…how about this pot? Will it do?” I nodded at him and took it away towards the tent.

  “Dillee! Where are you, buddy? I need your help.” I called out to him

  Minding his own business and being useful to the group. Dillee diligently drew a map for the trio after a moment with Wardi in the morning.

  Spurred on by the sound of his best friend, he came running immediately.

  “Sir? How may I aid you on this fine day?” Dillee replied to him. Smiling with his bright yellow face. MC took him into the tent and began speaking with him.

  “Buddy, I hate to ask, but I need you to turn into your other form ~” He didn’t even need to finish, and Dillee had already switched forms. Snarling away in the tent. MC said to him, “I need you to drool into this, buddy, can you do that for me?” He passed him the pot, and I don’t think I need to explain what happens next.

  Unauthorized usage: this narrative is on Amazon without the author's consent. Report any sightings.

  ***

  “Did any of you get a bad feeling just now?” Rhua asked the others.

  “Now that you mention it. A thought just entered my head, that a terrible crime had just been committed.” Lucy replied, looking concerned.

  “Stop getting distracted, you two.” Said Wardi

  ***

  So anyway, Dillee was happy that he got a job from the master and filled up that pot with only the finest of drools. And considering his size, it didn’t take long either.

  “Thanks a bunch, Dillee! I’m so proud of you, we’re good!” MC hugged Dillee, who began sobbing with pride that he did well, slowly shrinking back to his usual self and hiding a tear from the one above all.

  “Be right back, both!”

  Dillee walked over to Horace and spoke with him.

  “There goes my sire. The finest gent that walks across the land. Treading ground that is not worthy of his boot. Beautiful.” Horace snorted, pretending it was a reaction to one of the things he was making. He knew what was going on, this was a secret he was taking to the grave.

  I began making my back over to Bream, ready to dish out some Drooli justice for being a jackass. I’m curious as to what he will think of it. It smells pretty good to be fair, if it hadn’t come from his mouth, I’d have probably tried it myself.

  Bream was ecstatic about the trade.

  “Cor, that smelled incredible from ere, and I can’t wait to cook up some dishes with it. Here, that’s more than I expected, have this factory-made bottle to, it’s flexible, made for the future or some shit.” Handing over a generic and sort of fancier-looking bottle to MC, he was thrilled.

  Have fun ya twat! Zing-zing! I thought, smiling now that I’ve begun my long-term plan for group domination. “Pleasure doing business with ya!” I replied.

  These bottles will do just nicely. It’s time to make a move, however. And I helped clear up so we could get going. It was going to be a long trip southward, that’s for sure.

  Wardi, Rhua and Lucy, meanwhile. They are out having the time of their lives working on that cardio, getting to Hockers Hamlet and beyond to the Castle.

  Lucy, huffing and puffing, asked to take a break. Not on Wardi’s watch, however. He stopped and drank a strength potion. Picked her up and carried on running.

  “This train ain’t stopping. The sooner we get there, the quicker we can get back to those three. If we keep up this pace, we can reach it in an hour tops without interruptions.” Said Wardi

  The trio were making their way across some surprisingly easy routes this time. Flat and freshly laid roads were a blessing, compared to the rocky paths they had been jogging and climbing recently.

  There were flowers as far as the eye can see. Not nice one’s mind. They were They were called Path Pouncers. Vicious buggers, that didn’t mind chomping at people, animals even themselves sometimes. How joyous. It was unwise to step off the beaten path, lest you risk being overwhelmed.

  “I wonder how often the plants managed to get anyone these days?” said Lucy, admiring the view. As nasty as the things were, they did look pretty. Until they pounced, of course

  Wardi laughed and replied, “As nice as they were to look at. Those petals were razor sharp, that’s how I had a bit of my ear off.”

  Rhua, being the hardass she is, responded, “First time any of us received a permo wasn’t it that day. Was the southern end, though, if I remember not this western route.”

  Wardi had to think about it for a moment because they didn’t have a map at that point in time. Eventually, remembering, he nodded yes.

  “Wasn’t my finest moment when Plantdusa tried to make out with me.” He said, causing everyone and him to laugh.

  ***

  “Someone’s trying to take my thunder,” I said

  “What do YOU mean, MC?” piped Horace.

  “A whisper across the breeze. A zingeroni.” I followed up with

  “Sir, give me permission and I will restore your honour through a Leafy Lamping.”

  “I FEEL YOUR pain, MC” piped Horace.

  ***

  Wardi’s estimates were pretty accurate, as the trio reached Hockers Hamlets within 65 minutes. Pure, unadulterated sweating goodness was granted to them for the effort. Lucy had fallen asleep from the travelling, much to the surprise of Rhua and Wardi.

  “Oi Hatcot,” Wardi said, causing Lucy to wake up and slide down from Wardi’s shoulders.

  “I’m not seeing anything that says, ‘you can buy things here” Rhua said, looking around.

  “Yes, it is quite an empty town. It’s my first time here and I’m not particularly impressed.” Lucy said in response.

  “To be fair, this won’t take long. Just needed a place to take a breather without worrying about anything along the way.” Wardi continued, saying he would take a wander over to the guard station that he spotted in the distance.

  Lucy and Rhua talked amongst themselves, trying to pass the time.

  “What do you think happened to Edge Lord? Those rapids stretch quite the distance.” Lucy asked Rhua, curious about what she thought.

  “Hmm…well, there’s no way Dillee managed to take him out permanently. He’s not ranked number 2 for nothing. I hope there was nobody he could fight nearby when he got out.” Said Rhua

  “When was the last time you checked the rankings? It would be kind of fun, don’t you think, to take a peek?” Lucy was excited. Gaining levels is a slow process with their pacing, and they’ve jumped up several in such a short space of time.

  “I’m good. Feel free if you want to, though,” Rhua replied. Lucy began flicking through her status windows, hands waving like a mad conductor. Rhua looked away whilst Lucy was chuckling, looking like a mime in the middle of the village square. And one look was all it took…that’s when the tears started coming.

  She sniffled at the sight of it at first. Rhua, in response, assumed it was from excitement building up. There was none of her squeaking this time. The trembling lips of Lucy, sputtering windy nonsense and holding back the waterworks, were all she could hear.

  Fy faen Luce, this is killing me! Rhua thought as she saw Lucy had flopped to the floor and zipped up her hatflap, hiding a weeping face from the world.

  “I-I- want everyone to know I’m a real full-fledged adventurer. Sniffles. Not some top ninety percenter. I want to show I’m worth something.” She said, sobbing away.

  “It’s ok Lulu. Rankings don’t matter. Whether you’re first or last, you’re irreplaceable to me and the others. You’ve been saving all our hides for so long now, I’m beyond proud of you.”

  A touching moment between the two. Lucy sat up, and a touching hug flew at her from Rhua. Swaying with her. Lucy was gripping tightly to Rhua’s arm as she kneeled beside her, comforting her further. Wardi had snuck in himself, hugging the same way as Rhua did. He mouthed to Rhua ‘What’s going on?’ and she mouthed back ‘Rankings check.’ Nodding back at Rhua, he stayed silent, waiting for a sign of the sobbing to pass.

  Lucy whispered under her breath, “I’m ok now.” After a few seconds. The two helped her stand back up straight, dusting herself off from pebbles and dirt from the floor.

  “Thank you both.” She said, straightening her hat up.

  “You’re alright, chick.” Said Rhua. Nodding to Wardi to signal what the next move is.

  To all the cool people on this journey.

  (??????)