I bet you smell like coffee smothered in gin.

  Oh, how I like your fair alabaster skin.

  Your hair so thick, slick, and beautifully brown.

  Your taunting blue eyes,

  oh, how they glimmer when you smile.

  I would love to kiss, suck and nip

  that watermelon pink bottom lip.

  Dude, you making a black girl blush!

  White boy, you need to quit!

  Support creative writers by reading their stories on Royal Road, not stolen versions.

  I bet you’re kinky, freaky, and adventurous in bed.

  You got that good guy, boy next door, I’m innocent charm.

  That type of look that tells a girl you’d do no harm,

  but once behind the scenes

  you’d probably make a girl scream!

  Taunting her body, making her twist and turn.

  Bend her to your will,

  what she doesn’t know, she surely will learn.

  I bet you smell like coffee smothered in vodka.

  Perhaps you’ll bend me over your lap,

  slap my rear and make me call you papa.

  You make me blush when I see your pictures.

  Mr. Hollywood,

  you can smile and laugh all you want,

  but I know you’re up to no good.

  That furred face, arms, and chest,

  oh my, I do digress!

  What were you saying?

  Pardon me while I breathe.

  Why, I’ve been holding my breath!

  I bet you are the king of your castle.

  A righteous and gentle ruler

  who treats your girl like a queen,

  for the bedroom is the only place you’re probably mean.

  So, what is a girl to do?

  Is there really a point to this lust?

  I’ll never get to touch or smell you.

  I guess this little fan girl

  will keep spamming pictures of you across the net,

  cuz that’s about as close to you as she’ll ever get.

  - dedicated to Chris Evans