A week had already passed by since the annual banquet. Kacie had adjusted here as well. With all the docility around me I did not expect my day to still end up like this. Alone, I sat at the ke, my mind though, still by the firepce of our library. My hands albeit, no longer warm, but freezing under the open sky. Plucking the grass, I thought of the scene that has happened countless times now with little variations. I would pick a book from library, wear a certain dress, it would remind father of my mother. Demanding from me to hand over the book and never touch it again. It used to make me upset, but it has been so long I got used to of his behaviour. What I could not get used to was the pain caused me by remembering her.

  He forgets that I remember all the memories I had with them. An eight years old child is not as little as he thinks. He lost a wife but I lost him alongside mother as well. My face may remain calm but my eyes were filling with tears I was trying to hold back. Here I was again, with no improvement.

  This time he got upset at the dress I wore. It was my mother's and it fitted me perfectly. Aunt Lily gave it to me before leaving. Pale blue gown that reached just above me ankles, showing a glimmer of her silver anklet. Neckline dipped just enough to show my neck, covered in pearls. It was my mother's favourite dress. And when I first twirled it, appearing from behind the screen, Lily had gasped.

  "You look just like Luce." Her voice thick with tears.

  I wore it again today, thinking that father was away and I could change before he comes. I went to read the book my mother always read to me. I wanted to be like her. This was the only way I could feel her near me. But father had arrived earlier than I expected. At first, he was stunned which gave me hope that he might like it after all. But my hope was shattered right after he sharply said to remove this dress and never wear it again or he will burn it. I did what I always used to do whenever this happened. Lock myself in the room quietly till midnight and then sneaked out.

  Tonight, however, was different. When I reached my pce, someone was already there. This had never happened before. His body shone under the moonlight like a perfect sculpture. His bare back glistened with water. He shook his head making the water drop like rain from his white strands. The colour of his hair clicked in my mind.

  Him? I stared in utter shock. He was now out of the ke, sitting very near to me. Yet undoubtedly unaware of my presence. I held my breath in an attempt to retreat, but stepped on a branch rather loudly. Before I could even wince, he came at me with lightning speed. His rge body was towering at me and I might have paused to admire the close up when something cold touched my neck.

  A dagger. My eyes went wide in realization. I would have easily retaliated but I knew he was not aware who I was.

  "Lord Xavier?" I softly called out his name, recognition dawned in his eyes. His pupils dited in disbelief.

  "Yue." I heard him rasp. He was so close to me I could smell the petrichor scent from him.

  Wait, why is he still so close? And why does he keep calling me with this weird name? Does he confuse me with someone else? Perhaps his past lover? I was nervous and the proximity turned my mind into a whirlpool of thoughts. None of which were coherent.

  I could still feel his warm breath on me. My own breath hitched when his hands drew closer to my face. But he changed his mind and turned around. Very obviously taken aback. I was would have been lost in the way his shoulders flexed when he put on his vest. Had my eyes not caught the scar running along his spine to his left side. Wars always leave marks.

  His voice snapped me out of my thoughts. "What are you doing here at this hour dy?" My cheeks flushed.

  "I was bored at home. It brings me peace when I'm here alone." I spoke whatever came to my mouth to shake off the images from my mind. And it was not a lie. Just a half-truth. I hope he was not aware that I was staring at him. My leg shifted nervously. Thankful for the space he offered, I went past him and sat down.

  I huffed in annoyance at the wind, pushing hair out of my face. When I saw him taking a step back, for some reason I did not want him to leave. His eyes looked red and heavy earlier. I scooted to a side and looked up at him. Though, he might not wish to sit by someone’s side at the moment. Yet surprisingly I felt him fill the empty space. The silence was heavy, making it hard for me to stay still.

  "I come here when I miss my mother." I regretted it as soon as the words left my mouth. It was stupid to think that he might have not heard me. The world around us was so still I could even hear my breathing. And so, I did what I had always done best. Turned the conversation towards others. "Something must have brought you here as well."

  I did not expect him to talk. But when he started, his deep voice, echoed in otherwise complete silence. Time kept moving, and words kept spilling out of his mouth. At that moment I felt closer to him more than anyone. We both were here to mourn for our mothers. He pced his head on my shoulder. This man was completely different from what he shows the world.

  “I do not know why I am doing this.” He muttered.

  “I will not betray your trust.” I wanted to assure him by telling him why I was here. I took a hold of his cold hands, in an attempt to provide warmth. And at once I regretted even thinking he could be civil like that. He pulled his hand sharply from my grasp and got up to leave.

  “Do not stay till te. It is not safe Yue.” The nerve of this man made me snap.

  “It is Yvonne. Lady Yvonne Sterling.” He pursed his lips and nodded stiffly.

  “Good night, dy Yvonne.”

  I understand that after sharing such a vulnerable moment of his life, he may want some time alone. But why would he shrug my hand like that. God why are men like that? I came here to have a good time and he made it worse.

  “I cannot find soce even at my comfort pce now.” I grumbled, all the way back home. Despite all that, a small part of me still wished he would find someone to seek warmth in. No child deserves what he went through.